hello kitty's blog

yo yo yogaaaa !

2009-09-21T15:09:00.000-07:00

So as I was reading Annie's blog today, I realized it has been 7 months since my last post. Wow. So much has happened since then! I feel like I should update my three lovely readers whom I love very, very much.

Almost 6 months ago, I started doing yoga teacher training (we'll call it TT, for short) with some amazing people. All ages, all sizes, all kinds of everything. My TT is the first one that is accredited by the state of Utah AND The Yoga Alliance, which means I am the real deal, peeps. Since then, my yoga practice has improved tons and I feel like I know how to relax in a way I never thought possible, unless it involved Tylenol PM. I have taught quite a few classes, including Upward Bound kids and girls that are currently in the Observation Unit in SLC. Love those girls, by the way. Love their sassyness and the dirty looks I get from them when I make class extra hard. It all pays off when I get sweaty hugs from them at the end of each practice. Ew I feel like I am this girl I know that sells Mary Kay shit and all she talks about is how Mary Kay has changed her life on her blog...sorry girls.

Boomer and Petunia are doing great, spoiled like always. Work is still crazy, I do enjoy being the only girl that works at the Tower though...and I'm finally getting the hang of it, too. People listen to my recommendations like I am some kind of Film Guru and people (as in boys and girls) flirt with me in hopes of getting free stuff. Suckers! Working at the Tower is much better than working at the Broadway, but I do like both places. The pay es no bueno, but at least I have a job...and I job I like.

Other than that, not much is going on. Let me know if anyone wants their ass kicked by me and yoga, I'll do it for free until I graduate next month. Looks like I'll be teaching stinky crust punks at the Boing! Collective and quite a few friends from work...so I'm excited. But yeah. Awesome. Writing on here again feels kind of awkward. Weird.

ps: the pose on the top of the page, Astavakrasana, is my current fave.

am I in ASPEN?

2009-02-14T16:43:00.000-08:00

(that's my PERFECT dog riding in the back seat like a little gentleman!!!!)

So everybody knows I love taking my mutts hiking, right? And I ALWAYS go to Red Butte because I love how wide the trail is and I can see my big yellow dog at all times. Petunia goes on a leash, but we jog it out so she has fun as well. ANYWAY, I am SO bugged. I just barely got back from a walk with my dogs (Red Butte) and SOOO many people were freaking out about Boomer! YES, he got an allergy test done and YES, that's why he has his side shaved! JEEZ people, it's not like my dog has some kind of fucking dog disease that is going to get on your fucking purebred schnauzer! You don't fucking SHOO my dog when he wants to sniff your dog! You don't need to look at me like I am a piece of shit dog owner for taking my leper dog hiking! HE HAS HIS SIDE SHAVEN, PEOPLE! It's not like he is missing an eye ball or a LEG!
So on that note, THREE people shoo'ed poor Boomer away, 2 people gave me crusties and only ONE person, a lady with three MUTTS, was all nice about Boomer's shaved side and asked me if he was okay. Another lady goes, "WOW, your dog got into a REALLY bad fight!" It's like yeah, dog genius lady, my dog got into a HUGE fight and he got perfectly lined black polka dots on his side from it! WOAH! It was like a GEOMETRIC dog fight! And then this other guy who had this like, MATCHING outfit to take his cute dog for a walk got all annoyed that my dog got some fucking SNOW on him from running around! MY GOODNESS, PEOPLE! Keep your clean ass home if you don't want to get sweaty and SNOWY! And I mean, who wants to get SNOWY, right?! EW. I felt like I had taken my dog to like, some resort town where dogs aren't supposed to be off leash or something! I am never going to take my dogs in the afternoon again, IT SUCKED! they had fun, though. I wanted to let Petunia go off leash when people gave me crusties so she could go and bite their faces off.

ps: i am going to make my blog private, so leave your email and i'll add you.

WHY?

2009-02-09T07:50:00.001-08:00

neon colors are back (LOVE!) and marc jacobs is making me sad again. thanks a lot, marc.

wah wah wah

2009-02-04T15:01:00.000-08:00

i just called my parents and found out that my mom and dad, grandpa, val, lelis and edson are all eating PIZZA at my FAVORITE PIZZA PLACE to celebrate Val's recovery! oh, how i wish i was there...i want to hug them ALL so bad!

say WHAT?!

2009-02-04T13:48:00.000-08:00

ps: this entry sounds like crap because i am writing it and talking on the phone at the same time.

living where i live isn't cheap. nothing is cheap these days, i guess. but one of the perks of living where the husb and i live is that there are ASSIGNED parking spots. i took it for granted until they started remodeling the pillars on the bottom floor and i had to park on the street for 2 months, but i am very grateful for it now. which is why it pisses me off to NO END when i come home and there is a car in my effing spot. today there were literally 10 other spots, but the beast of a man chose MINE. now, if there is a van parked there or if it is a person who is cleaning an apt or doing remodeling (i have those people's cars memorized, thank you very much), i let it slide. my spot is right by the steps, and i would hate to haul a vacuum across the parking lot to then go up the stairs. and plus, the people who clean here are SO nice. i've even attempted my spanish with a few of them, and they understood me (so shove it, all of you who think i don't know espanol). good thing smiling is a universal thing though. ANYWAY, the car that was in my spot was a jacked up Grand Cherokee. he got some minus points right off the bat for the U2 and Linkin' Park stickers (sorry, anna banana) and for the car being jacked up, so we were already off to a very bad start. as i start to doodle a note for the effer, the dude comes out talking on his cell phone. he was already annoyed when he saw that i was parked behind his car, but as he looked at me i said "HEY! that's my SPOT!" (please remember how geeky i am and how not even my meanest scowl and voice scare anyone, including my terrier). just when things couldn't get any cooler, he goes...actually, this is easier:

Flavia: HEY MOTHER EFFER, THAT'S MY EFFING SPOT! (just kidding, i didn't say it like that)

the dude: just a MINUTE, i'm on the PHONE!

Flavia: ?! (i hate a WTF look on my face)

the dude: i'm LEAVING, okay? JEEEEZ.

yeah. no apologies, no nothing. wanna hear something else that's bad? i got an awesome vest at j. crew that makes me smell like b.o. i know what you are thinking, how can that be?! well, the armpits are too high on it and there is no ventilation, so therefore i smell like b.o. now. and all during french class, i felt embarrassed because i knew people could smell me. and i got up early and showered AND washed and blow dried my hair! so i looked so fresh and so clean clean (love that song), but smelled like b.o. awesome.

change of heart

2009-02-02T14:45:00.000-08:00

i just came back from walking my dogs. man, my dogs are so great. they know exactly what to do to cheer me up.

as petunia noticed that these two anoying white dogs were sitting at their window, she decided to provoke them. i usually don't let her, but she just looked so cute and mean that i had to. so she barks, growls, runs from side to side...all of this on her hind legs, because since the window is high up, she wanted to keep an eye on the pups while being a ho to them. so a few seconds later, when the two dogs were pissed off enough, she decided to pee on their yard. not only that, but she trots a little further and poops in their yard as well! she is so rad. i do feel i have a little petunia in me most the time.

a little while later, boomer finds a spot to poop. he is extremely choosy about where he poops, he usually trots from side to side for about 30 seconds until he finds the perfect spot. after he is done, he usually kicks the grass behind him. now lacy help me out: is that to SPREAD the scent or CAMOUFLAGE it? i am hoping you know the answer. it could be both for all i know. anyway, i like it when there is snow on the ground because boomer kicks the snow and it looks way cute. so today, as he goes to kick the snow, petunia stands right behind him and gets a bunch of snow thrown at her face! she sneezes and gets super pissed and flies at boomer's neck. they full on started wrestling in the middle of a building's yard! it was soooo cute! a car even slowed down! i'm sure the person thought i was an idiot for laughing while my dogs looked like they were killing each other, but petunia is the only one that bites boomer, boomer just sits there and makes funny sounds.

i feel a lot better and don't hate stuff as much. and you know what? fuck my test tomorrow, it's just french!

top things i hate

2009-02-02T13:27:00.002-08:00

*disclaimer: i have a feeling this post will have a lot of swear words in it. sorry. well actually, i'm not sorry.

i'm sure you can tell i'm having a radical day. let's get this party started:

-shitty food. i know, no one really likes shitty food, right? wrong. americans love shitty food. and shitty coffee, too. if it's trendy, people buy it. starbucks, for example. yuck.

-tests. i have a french test tomorrow. i hate tests.

-stupid neighbors. there is this guy that lives under us that thinks he is awesome. he would be awesome, if it was like, 1995. he is probably my age, but he clearly is not keeping up with the times. yesterday i saw him getting out of his car and he did the look-at-someone-over-the-top-of-their-sunglasses thing, and i had to bite my tongue to not laugh. his mom probably told him his 1991 lexus is bad ass, and he believed her.

-people that think they are awesome, but NEWSFLASH! they are not. this one is a constant in my life. these kind of people follow me wherever i go. they are every where. i am sick of it and one day i will seriously lose it. (miss you, tara!)

-sluts. i counted 6 sluts today on my way to class. weren't UGG boots and skirts cool in like, high school? yeah. my point exactly.

i have to study, i'll continue working on this gem a little later.

be ready to be jealous!

2009-01-27T08:07:00.000-08:00

guess who is HOME right now, all cuddled up in warm blankets? Yup, me, Boomer and the Toonce! I was really excited to be able to watch The City, Daddy's Girls and GG this morning, but unfortunately GG is a rerun. Bummer.
I slipped and ALMOST fell yesterday by the library at school and landed on my right ankle. It's been weak since I was 16 and tried to jump over a bush to land on the street, but landed in the gutter instead. Yeah, Ammon was there with me though so it wasn't that bad. But still, it hurts. he wrapped my ankle for me which proves he really does love me, since he had to stare at my feet for like over a minute. i think my feet are way cute, especially since they aren't all crocked from all my years of ballet, but everybody knows how bad ammon hates feet. a foot fungus spray commercial can ruin his whole day.
I haven't updated cause there really isn't much going on. Val is still cancer-free, i'm still not eating chocolate (6 more months! woohoo!) and things in Brasil are fine.
OH here is something awesome! Guess what Ammon and I watched at home yesterday? The Wrestler. You might be asking yourself, isn't that movie JUST BARELY out? oh yes, it is. let me tell you, it feels awesome to know people who know people that are film critics. i also want to watch that Shopaholic movie that looks totally lame but the person who did the outfits is the same lady who did Sex and the City. I will probably have to go by myself, I can't see ammon enduring 90 minutes of a crappy movie just for vintage Dior.
i am very excited to meet tara's baby today. can you imagine, a tincy tara? i can't wait. i've been praying all morning. btw, did you guys hear about the woman who had octuplets in LA? that's like, as many puppies as a Lab has! crazy.

Marley & Me and Olivia

2009-01-18T09:32:00.001-08:00

Ah, such a clever title!
Saturday night I had a very special date to the movies: Olivia Pate, my fave niece. She is 9 years old. She is also da bomb. She didn't say one word during the two hour long movie! Yes, it helped that the film was about our favorite subject in the world (turns out Olivia is a dog lover like me! Woohoo!) but still, she was super mature and fun to be with. Her and her brother, Vincent, slept over last night. They are very well-behaved little kittens, but I still don't get HOW people can have all these kids and have fun things to do with them all the time. While Olivia and I went to the movies, Ammon stayed home with Vincent and played video games. And this morning, Ammon baked Dutch Babies for me and the kittens. What a sweetie! Heehee!
We will be going on a hike later, so I will post pictures tomorrow.
You should all be jealous, we are having a lot of fun.
ps: even though this was the second time I saw this movie, I still cried the entire time. dogs are so the best.

ASPCA article

2009-01-16T08:23:00.001-08:00

On December 30, rapper DMX—known legally as Earl Simmons—pleaded guilty to one count of misdemeanor animal cruelty, among other charges for theft and drug possession. The charges stem from a raid in August 2007, when Maricopa County sheriff's deputies descended on Simmons’s Arizona home, finding 12 malnourished pit bulls and the remains of three dogs.

To assist law enforcement officials in their efforts to prosecute Simmons, the ASPCA’s Mobile Animal Crime Scene Investigation (CSI) Unit was called into action. Leading the forensic investigation, the ASPCA’s Dr. Melinda Merck examined the remains of the dead dogs recovered from his property."I was very impressed with the level of commitment from the Maricopa County Sheriff's Department on this case," says Dr. Merck. "I have worked with many different law enforcement agencies all over the country, and the team working on this investigation was extremely dedicated."

For the record, Simmons is a repeat offender—in 2002, the rapper pleaded guilty to 13 counts of animal cruelty, charges resulting from the neglect of 13 pit bulls. As a result of this most recent prosecution, the rapper faces at least 90 days in jail, can never again own any animals and must attend an animal offender treatment program. A parole violation would send him to jail for more than 10 years. A sentence hearing has been scheduled for January 30.

"The ASPCA is proud to have had its expert staff be a part of this important case," says ASPCA President and CEO Ed Sayres. "Dr. Merck's knowledge and practice of veterinary forensics is truly at the forefront of animal cruelty investigations. With stronger evidence collected by Dr. Merck, law enforcement officials and prosecutors are able to get stronger convictions against those who commit these terrible acts."

run, petunia, run

2009-01-15T20:28:00.000-08:00

have you ever had an idea that you felt was bad from the start? i have. i actually always have them, but i just tell myself i'll be fine. i made one of those decisions this afternoon.
i went to class in the morning, and when i got home, i decided to go crazy and clean everything. after that, i thought i'd take the pups for a hike. i waited til Ammon got home, hoping he'd come with me, but turns out he didn't want to. i am really afraid to hike in the dark, but i thought it was still pretty light out and that St. Francis would have all the animals (cougars, tigers, bears...animals that hang out at Red Butte Garden) stay put inside their little homes while i was out and about. i never recovered from the day Boomer got attacked by the moose, so i'm still pretty...you know, pretty freaked out. especially since Boomer "forgets" to listen sometimes when we go hiking.
Anyway, it started getting dark pretty fast. As soon as I started the hike, i saw a deer leg, femur exposed and all. i just prayed that the lil' critter that ate it would stay put til i got home. still, the entire hike (which i basically jogged out, since i was so scared of every little sound) i kept on thinking every person was like a t-rex in the distance that was going to devour my golden retriever/yellow lab mix and eat me and jack russell mix right after. i had no i.d. on me, so how were they going to identify my body? i've never had any cavities, so that wouldn't work. and the animal would probably eat all my skin, so they couldn't i.d. me with the help of my tattoos...yeah. scary shit.
but, St. Francis helped me out and i made it, guys. i'm still alive, skin, teeth and all. and i can still go to ann's dinner on friday. yay! that's what i call a lovely night.
ps:the sunset was beautiful and it was totally worth being scared for 30 minutes to witness it.

oui!

2009-01-14T12:36:00.000-08:00

french class is hard, but i determined to learn that language even if it kills me. my dad is so proud, you have no idea.
yesterday during class i mentioned i was from brasil (probably the first words i ever spoke in that class...BRASIL PRIDE!) and today this boy that sits next to me (and asks really obvious questions) thought he'd ask ME a few questions as well. here is how it went down:

Boy: so you're from brasil?
Me: yes! it's the best place ever!
B: i don't know, i'm kind of neutral about it.
M: have you been there?
B: no, why should i go...?!
M: no reason, just wondering...(I was starting to get pretty annoyed, obvs)
B: so are you LDS?
M: uuuuh...?
B: you're NOT mormon?!?!?!?! (he was shocked, to say the least)
M: no, i'm catholic.
B: WHY?
M:...?
B: i mean, that's weird...!
M: how is being catholic weird?
B: it just IS. it doesn't make sense!

after that, i told him i had to get back to my magazine and we could talk later. thanks for saving my ass, Vogue.

Royal Bedroom

2009-01-12T07:10:00.000-08:00

it is one of my dreams to sleep in a castle in europe. my dad never wanted to, because he complained it was too cold and drafty. it is one of my life goals to sleep in a royal bedroom like this one!!! (those pics are of a castle in paris, obvs)

cute!

2009-01-11T21:27:00.001-08:00

Little Kid Cant Figure Out How To Drink - Watch more Free Videos

I felt guilty for laughing at the injured kid. this one is cute. i like how he goes "aaaaaaah!" after he drinks it. ammon does that, too. heehee.

ready or not, here i come!

2009-01-11T20:31:00.000-08:00

French class starts tomorrow! Oui oui! J'adore Paris! Croissant! Petit fours! Yeah. I'm scared. I am 27 years old, and I am scred to go to class. hmmm.

In other news, Val's best friend had a 10 lb baby this weekend. She made it, T. My mom said the baby was almost Petunia-sized! Haha! I'm excited. Come out, G!

I am in LOVE with the purse that girl is carrying (notice it is just like mine, but mine is royal blue). She is coming out of Fashion Week in Rio de Janeiro. Ah, Fashion Week. I will one day do something fashion-related.

rosemary's baby

2009-01-09T08:21:00.000-08:00

So last night it was pretty cold. As I was taking my pups out for one last pee (I take them on a rather long stroll at about 6-7pm, and then when 9-10pm comes around i just make them pee real fast out front), I was surprised by my down-the-hall neighbors. These aren't just good old regular neighbors, these peeps are AWESOME college people that dress cool and drive a green 4 Runner. The girl has been pretty rude to me before, and the guy is just dirty. Like "needs to shower" dirty, he hasn't like, sexually harassed me or anything. So anyway, as I am walking passed their door, the slut storms out and KNEES my Boomer on the riblets! And he even like, HUFFED to catch his breath! Lacy, can you believe this?! So Petunia is out for revenge as she tries to jump for the girl's jugular, but I stopped her just in time. I was so surprised and scared, I didn't even know what to say. I wanted to say "EXCUSE YOU!", but I thought she would kick my ass. She seems like that type. And then this morning, after I dropped Ammon off at work, the dirty guy was warming his car up and he SPIT on the ground as he was getting in. EW.

i wish...

2009-01-08T07:15:00.001-08:00

one, i wish i was as skinny as this betty girl that does a fashion blog i read daily. two, i wish i lived in paris, like her. going to paris 10 times hasn't cured me of my paris fever...yet. i want to LIVE there.

which brings me to my new year's resolutions. you know how for lent, people give up something they love for a week? well i decided to go a tiny step over and give something up for 8 months. chocolate. chocolate and i love each other. i gave it up to ask for blessings for Val during her surgery and recovery. problem is, i have actual dreams that i am eating chocolate. mmm, i love chocolate. so i guess one of my resolutions is to be strong and find a new snack.

another of my resolutions is to go to yoga 5 times a week. i love love love yoga, so that won't be a problem...problem is, i never find time. i also want to eat healthier, still only eat chicken or fish once a week and not be anemic, and stop eating things that are bad for me. i love things that are bad for me. not alcohol and cigs, but you know...chocolate, cupcakes, macaroons, big bowls of pasta, 5 slices of settebello pizza, french fries, you name it. so yes, i will eat better. and i will go back to weighing 110bs, once i lose these damn 8 lbs.

i'll think of more as i go. OH i also want to be a better dog mom and go on hikes more than twice a week. AND i want to get a job!!!! i would love a job.

we'll see. OH i also want Gwen to be born so i can hold her and so she won't be a 9lb baby and kill T.

grateful

2009-01-07T09:14:00.000-08:00

so yesterday was one of the best days of my life. no, i didn't get a new dog or found i am pregnant with triplets...instead, i got a best friend back. val had surgery yesterday to remove her tumor (she had HPV and never took care of it...) and after 7 hours of surgery, the doctors were able to remove the tumor and all (ALL!) the cancerous tissue. oh, how i cried. and laughed. at the same time. i couldn't stop hugging ammon and he finally asked me if i was that happy, how could i possibly still be crying? well, because i'm latin. and us latin folk cry when we are happy, sad, excited, scared...you know. kind of like how guns and roses has a song for every occasion (if you are feeling like a rebel: welcome to the jungle. romantic: november rain. really happy: paradise city. if you are pregnant: sweet child o' mine), us latin people can adapt our tears to whatever the need.

that's val up there on that picture. that's the dog she adopted. and those are her kids. and yes, one of her sons is wearing a Thundercats tshirt. i love that shirt.

so bring it on, 2009. i'm ready for whatever you have in store for me.

for lacy, with love

2009-01-06T20:56:00.000-08:00

Little Kid Slammed by Door - Watch more Free Videos

pissed off at stuff and lacy

2009-01-05T16:48:00.001-08:00

so normally i am a pretty chipper gal...i try to be positive, i am hardly ever in a bad mood and i worry about others before myself. i sound like a gem, right? not quite. being so sweet has taken a toll on me and i have been a grumpy bear the passed few weeks. my grumpyness goes away when i see the husband, but when i'm by myself i am so pissed off about everything i can't stand it! i don't know what is wrong with me. actually, i do. people piss me off. stupid people. i am pissed val has cancer and so many other fuck faces i know are healthy. i am pissed i am craving so much sugar. i am pissed about people who are selfish mother fuckers and only worry about themselves. and i'm pissed at lacy. yes, at lacy. i haven't seen miss lacy for a while, but she pisses me off. i just read her last entry to her blog and i am PISSED. i was pissed mass got cancelled, and reading the bullshit she wrote about herself made me huff out loud.

Dear Lacy:
You piss me off. How dare you say such negative things about yourself? I think you are so sweet and smart, generous, funny and all-around amazing, why the FUCK are you so hard on yourself? I can introduce you to plenty of losers, if you need a self esteem boost. If you want to go back to school, do it. But don't say you want to go back because you want to make something of yourself. Do you know what a doofus I am? that I am 27, got fired from a fucking grocery store and I am yet to graduate from school? Or maybe that I pay over $100 every month to go to Yoga and I haven't been to class in months?! Seriously. Or maybe that I dream about my dead dog at least once a week and giggle out loud and call out "HERSHEY!" in my sleep?! Lacy! Please. If you want to have a loser contest, I'll win. Don't even challenge me.
I adore everything about you and I hate feeling all helpless when you write sad posts. I am only writing this to you here because one, I don't have your email and two, you left the comments off on your blog.

I feel better. I am so classy, love it.

marc jacobs

2008-12-28T08:03:00.001-08:00

marc jacobs and his BRAZILIAN boyfriend, in St. Barths. marc knows what's up.

seriously?

2008-12-27T07:52:00.000-08:00

seriously.

one more day...wah

2008-12-17T09:41:00.000-08:00

I'm pretty bummed I'm leaving. I'm bummed I'm leaving Val before she removes her tumor, I'm bummed I'm leaving my mom when she is so worried and stressed, and I'm bummed to be leaving my grandpa, dad, and mutts. And Marina, too, I guess. I really like my country and my home.

This morning was pretty fun. I went to the grocery store to pick up stuff for tonight (my family is having a Christmas dinner tonight so I can celebrate it with them and one on the 24th) with my mom and then I went to my Gynecologist. Boy, I sure love those Pap Smears! I went to my mom's Gyno because he is closer to my house, but imagine my surprise as I walked into the waiting room and saw this:

She wasn't wearing a bikini, but you get the idea. That's Isabeli Fontana. She is a Gucci and Victoria's Secret model. She is way too skinny though. I couldn't stop looking at her, she is really really pretty. She had the most beautiful Valentino clutch. I bet she even got it for free. Slut. And I wasn't really into her outfit. But she is very, very pretty and very, very tall. And very, very skinny.

I am now going to prepare my salad for tonight. I like to make salads.

I'll post some pictures of tonight later, I'll probably even be in some! WOAH!

first floor: chanel, valentino and louis vuitton!

2008-12-15T05:41:00.000-08:00

ah, the mall. how i love that place. while i can't afford much at the moment, i love to try tons of stuff on. and nothing fits as well as a couture dress. i've felt like a princess all week!
i went to the Buddhist temple with my dad yesterday and I loved every minute of the 4 hour chanting session. it was so neat. i cried a lot, it was so neat-sounding. and there was so many things to look at inside the temple! i couldn't take any pictures, but my dad has some and promised to send them my way.
yesterday i also went to the country club with marina, to watch her friends play soccer. they decided on pink skorts instead of shorts...because that way, it looks like something serena or blair would wear. no joke. and they are all gorgeous, skinny little things with gisele bundchen hair. being 15 was so much fun!
madonna is playing here tomorrow. my other cousin, yana, who is a model, has free tickets and invited me to go. i guess it's sold out all over the world or something...i'll probably go. they are floor tickets, so i'll probably get stepped on and elbowed. that's the only reason why i don't like going to shows.
i am going for a run. i just wanted to brag a bit, since i will be back to doing chores and walking my mutts as of friday. what a perfect break! i love my country and family!!!

saturday!

2008-12-13T09:45:00.000-08:00

i've always loved saturdays and sundays. not just because it's the weekend, but because my crazy family hangs out at the country club. and i'm lame and forgot my camera, but that's okay.
my 14 year old cousin plays tennis almost professionally. she is really good, and she plays for our country club when they have matches against other clubs. she beat a 25 year old professional girl today. yeah. it was pretty awesome. her name is camila, she is marina's sister. marina said she wants to start playing tennis because she saw a Chanel tennis racket that was pink and had the double Cs on the net. ha!
after the match, we all had lunch. i found out my uncle is going to argentina for the new year, to Patagonia. i would love to go there. ah, one day.
tomorrow i have marina's graduation to attend. she got an amazing roberto cavalli dress for the party, she looks gorgeous. i'm excited to be here with her. growing up and living in utah makes it hard for me to attend her ballet performances and even her birthdays. i hate not being here to see her grow up.
i love my crazy family. and i love how no one in it is normal.
i'll post pictures of everything tomorrow, after marina's graduation.

rabbit's foot

2008-12-10T13:14:00.000-08:00

I consider myself a very lucky girl. I have a wonderful life with wonderful parents and husb, and I am usually really healthy, except for these nasty colds I've been getting. As I went in to get some blood tests this week (4 years ago, when my dad was murdered, I had a seizure due to stress and lack of sleep) to check how my bod is functioning, I started thinking about Val. Val, named Valdeci Matos dos Santos, is one of my best friends. She is 32. She has two kids. She is GORGEOUS (she is black with green eyes). She loves dogs, chocolate cake, rice with beans and guaraná. She tells really good jokes and can kill a cockroach faster than anyone I've ever seen. Not only that, but she is able to hit the cockroach's head, so no juice comes out when it is smashed. She makes me perfect french fries. She is the only reason my mom is able to come and visit me in Utah, because mommy dearest only trusts Val to take care of the pups. Val is AMAZING. And Val found out a few weeks ago that she has Cancer. She had HPV a long time ago and never took care of it (couldn't afford it), so it turned into a very agressive tumor. My mom is taking her to every doctor she knows of, and Val will be getting surgery at the hospital I was born in soon. She is very afraid, it breaks my heart to see her cry. It was so hard to see my grandma die because of Cancer, and my step dad had Cancer (he is cured now), and now my grandpa is battling it...it's crazy. Cancer is so awful. If I was a doctor, I would focus solely on finding a cure for Cancer. This disease has affected me on so many levels, I wish it didn't exist.
I feel so blessed to be healthy. I always worry about so many things, and as soon as I start to think about Val and how she feels right now it's like none of it matters, because everything I am worried about can be fixed.

WOOHOOOOOO

2008-12-08T13:21:00.000-08:00

marina and the horses and the place where I won my first blue ribbon!!!! Brasil rules, United States droolz.

neverland ranch minus Michael Jackson

2008-12-08T12:59:00.000-08:00

I can't load my pictures. I hate how my pictures from my camera are HUGE and it takes 10 minutes for the stupid things to load and be added on my blog.

First things first: PLEASE COME SPEND 3 WEEKS AT MY HOUSE, BRETT AND TARA. pay for your tickets and my fam will pay for the rest. i won't, because I have no money. As in my mom gives me money every time I leave the house. I'm 18 all over again. My brother is taking me out to dinner tonight and I told him he has to pay because I barely have enough money to get an espresso. But PLEASE, B&T, consider yourselves MORE than invited to come over. We can go to the beach, lay out, and I'll even let you bring the Gwen. Because I'm nice like that. Let me know when you wanna red rover and I will make all sorts of fun plans. Museums, restaurants, the works. And Tara will have to make the lasagna for my parents...because she will have to pay us back somehow. And Brett can juggle, or something...

OH I saw a house today that was up for sale and it was 6 million reais...like 3 million dollars, about. Bulletproof windows and doors, cameras everywhere, it was CRAZY. Like the new Britney Spears cd. WOW. Being poor sucks.

I know that every time I blog it sounds like I'm bragging and saying stuff just to make everyone jealous, but truth is, that's exactly what I'm doing. My life there is the opposite of what it is like here, and I love reading my posts from Brasil because I feel like I am two different people: Brasil Flavia and Utah Flavia. I do my hair every day here, I wear nice outfits to go to the mall, it's weird. I have no dogs to walk, I don't have to make my own food, I have my mom to spoil me and make me giggle all day, my dad to teach me about the simple Buddhist way of life, my grandpa to remind me that I am loved but to him I will always be 10 years old...I love it here. I will take pictures of my room, but it is seriously a 15 year old's room. And that's the age I feel like I am here. Because it's all fun. No worries, no responsibilities...."bliss", as Miss Johnson would say. It is the best way to get over the Whole Foods thing. Yeah, I laugh about it and stuff, but I was really hurt. To get fired because I want to be treated fairly?! Because I don't want some fuck face to call me cupcake and get away with it? Whatever. I am over it now, but it's nice to forget all your problems for 19 days. And I have plenty on my plate right now, besides being broke. PLE-N-TY. My dad always reminds me that we aren't given more than we can take, but holy shit, I think Jesus thinks I'm a lot stronger than I actually am. But nothing like taking things one day at a time, I guess. And being with my family reminds me of that. And seeing my crazy Russian aunt and now obsessed with appearance uncle reminds me that my life is deliciously normal. Quick little story: when I got here, I thought my uncle's eyebrows looked uneven, and Marina (my cousin) told me today that he got botox a little while ago. Yeah. My uncle. Weeeird.

I have to go shower. I spend the day at the club with Marina horseback riding and laying out and I smell like swimming pool.

I promise I'll post pictures soon, I have to figure out how to make them smaller first.

candyland

2008-12-04T13:45:00.000-08:00

What can I say about my passed few days? Of course there have been a few downs (like, 1), but other than that, my trip has been a 10 so far. I sleep in, I see my mom and dad and grandpa, I laugh with my snotty cousin, I pet my dogs, all my meals are prepared for me and I don't have to do dishes or make my bed...aaaah. What would I do without my Brasil? Cry. That's what I would do.

My Russian aunt lives in a parallel universe. It's either hilarious or totally scary, depending on the way you look at it. She gardens "all day" (1 hour) and says she is exausted. She then has a person come to her house to give her a manicure and pedicure, because she doesn't feel like driving. She called my uncle at work and told him that she wants peaches, so he has to bring some home. She then begins to show me a Sotheby's catalog and says she found a jeweler who is going to make her a necklace like the one that was up for auction that was owned by Athena Onassis. I like to pretend I am in a movie when she talks to me so I don't feel weird about any of the crazy stuff she mentions.

Tomorrow I will go horseback riding. I am very excited. My friend from the country club called me and she just bought a new horse for her jumping competitions, I'm pumped to try him out. I am also excited to ride my aunt's horse again. He is mean and I like the challenge. Hopefully I won't break any bones. I'll take some pictures tomorrow.

tomorrow...

2008-11-28T22:28:00.000-08:00

i will fly home. i will be pissed off during my ten hour flight. i will eat crappy food. i will sit next to a person that is probably not too much fun. i will be uncomfortable. i will smell like airplane.

but then, the day after tomorrow....

i will hug my fam. i will go swimming, lay out, go to yoga with my mom, and maybe even fit horseback riding before it gets dark. i will go to mass. i will have dinner with my fam, kiss my mom, dad, grandpa, cousin, dogs and maids good night. a yellow lab named Waffles will sleep next to me on my bed. i will have sweet, spoiled dreams.

i will do no chores for 3 weeks. i will miss my boy toy. i will try to update my blog with all my fun and exciting activities. i will love every second of every minute of my trip. and then, when my three weeks are up, i will come home to my favorite boy. MY boy. He shopped with me for over 7 hours today. black friday. now THAT's true love.

ps: i got some stuff at urban outfitters today and i might trick some people into actually thinking i'm super cool.

SO grateful

2008-11-26T12:21:00.000-08:00

for dogs. Hershey, my first dog, died when she was 15. just 2 years ago. she wasn't the first dog I lived with, but she was MY first dog, as in mine all mine. I named her, took care of her, everything. LOVE YOU, MIMIS! I taught her some really funny tricks, but my all time fave was when I would say "Show me your facial features!" she would put her face on my hands. I grew up with her and she waited up for me as I got home from proms, parties, all of it. She was there when I got shitty grades, when I got good grades, and she wanted to sleep with Ammon every time Amms came down to Brasil. It was so cute.

And then, there is Boomer and Petunia. Those two are my first "my responsibility only" dawgs. They are so easy though, they teach me much more than I teach them.

I I am grateful for all the messes Boomer makes, and it makes me so happy to see the Toonce sleeping by the fire.

thankful for....

2008-11-26T11:36:00.001-08:00

I was tagged by 3 friends to do this thing, so here goes. you are supposed to write something you are thankful for, beginning with each letter of your first and last name. HOLLA!

F - fashion, family, friends, fun. I am pretty sure that covers my four fave things in life. Well, except for animals, maybe we can put pets under the "fun" category.

L - love, laughter, ludracris. I love rap, that's why LUDA! is on there. love and laughter, duh. Who doesn't like those things?!

A- Ammon. Our marriage is not perfect (is any one's?! Seriously.) but I adore him more than anything. I love making him laugh at my stupid jokes and I love watching Alton Brown by his side.

V - vacations. Going to Brasil makes me feel like a kid again. Yes, the 10 hour flight is no fun, but as soon as I go through security and see my entire family waiting for me, I cry like a baby. Every time.

I - ignorance. Yes, folks. I am even thankful for the ignorant idiots I have come to meet. Why? Because without them, I would have no desire to get smarter and more educated on things I care about.

A - ANIMALSSSSS!

A. - Amigos. Can I write stuff in Portuguese?! Well, friends are the spice of life. I am thankful for the friends I made while working at Whole Foods and that they still call me and invite me to hang out almost every night. Love it!

G. - Grandmas. My grandma passed away 3 years ago and nothing will ever be the same without her. There are still days when I'm like, "holy shit, gotta call grams and tell her about that!" and then, I'm like, "Oh yeah...". She was so awesome. TE AMO, VOVO!!!

S.- Sassyness. I loves sass. It' a gift. Petunia is the sassyest thing ever. She is my little sussy (suh-see = unexpected present or gift).

T. - Travis Barker. Did anyone think he was going to come out of that plane crash alive?! REALLY! just kidding. I am grateful for my step dad, who gave me the last name of Thiollier. It's french and snotty, just like me. My dad is awesome. He is Buddhist. He is at peace with the world. He doesn't care about material things. He loves to run and make fun of my mom and I. HOLLAAAA! Love the dad.

P - PETUNIA! She did bite my hand pretty hard today, but I know that little thing loves me. And boy, do I love her. I like it when she wants to attack people passing by us on the street. I like to pretend that she is defending me from robbers or scary rapists or something. I'm also thankful for Miuccia Prada, for making the world a better place with her handbags. GO MIU MIU!

A - ANIMALS! I love animals more than I love people. Judge me, see if I care. And if you are judging me, you are one of the reasons why animals are WAY cooler than people.

T - T & A. Porn, in general. I saw a title for a porn this week called "GASH BASH 2009". Pretty funny, huh? I'm not thankful for porn though. I am just having a hard time thinking of something that begins with T. TREASURES. No...TRICKS. No. Tori Spelling. I don't know. SHIT! I KNOW! I'M THANKFUL FOR TARA! THANKS TARA, FOR MAKING MY LIFE BETTER WITH YOUR CHICKEN LASAGNA AND FUN STORIES. And Tori Birch, for her amazing shoe designs.

E - Education. I love learning about stuff. I usually care about learning about stuff that is not useful, but hey, at least I'm learning.

*Just in case anyone is wondering why I have so many letters up there, that's because my real name is Flavia Augusta Goncalves Simardi Thiollier. But then, when the Pate came along, I changed it to Flavia Augusta Goncalves -Pate. Woah.

it's a doggy dog world

2008-11-25T12:18:00.001-08:00

I'm looking forward to spending time with all those snotty girls up there. My cousin, Marina, is the one with the grey top. Her and her friends invited me to go to the beach with them. Let me remind you they are 16 years old. Do I care? HELL no. I have so much fun with them and they are so rude and snotty...love it. They are like what I would have turned into if I had stayed in Brasil. They know and like everything I like and it's hilarious. They are like mini adults.

Moving on...

Who is cooler than my dog? Nobody. Well, maybe a couple of people, but other than that, NOBODY. Boomer cheers me up, watches me sing and dance when I'm home alone, sits by me while I pack to go to Brasil (HOLLAAAA! Home sweet home, here I come!), and puts up with all my kissing and squeezing without ever growling (unlike Petunia...). I LOVE YOU, BOOMER!

I just want to say a few things that really bother me:

-people who think they are hot shit but actually aren't
-those who don't love animals
-people that ask me to take them impossible things, like rollerblades or a horse saddle...yeah.
-food that tastes bad
-reality tv
-racism
-overalls
-people that pretend to be your friends but jump at the chance to be rude to you whenever they can

I'm kind of in a bad mood today. I should be thrilled that I'm packing and going home soon, but I'm kind of grumpy.

YOU'RE FIRED!

2008-11-20T13:40:00.000-08:00

**Picture Donald Trump here! His picture is not loading. Bummer!**

I got fired. Yup. At first, I cried. And then I got pissed. And then I cried again. I still don't get exactly what happened, but let's just say I wasn't fired because I deserved it. Part of me is glad though...I mean, I leave for Brasil in 10 days, I never have to do dishes or take the garbage out at Whole Foods again, I don't have to put up with rude people who get mad at me because the pizza is by the pound or because we are out of cheddar cheese. For that, I am grateful. But I'm going to miss the people I worked with. Wesley, the coolest 19 year old EVER, became one of my best friends and we would laugh for the entire 8 hours we worked together. We would sing, dance, make rude people shitty sandwiches with the shitty, fatty pieces of chicken, give nice people free stuff....it was da bomb. I know that whatever job I get next will be totally different than what I have experienced for these passed 9 weeks. Yes, it was hard, and yes, I came home crying sometimes...but boy, oh boy, did I have fun.
So now, let's move on. I'd like to give a special shout out to tha T-BONE (HOLLAAAA!) and her husband, Bretters, who cooked me the BEST chicken lasagna I have ever had. Sorry I didn't eat the bread crusts, T. Their pup Stella is sure adorable. Not only does she have a precious under bite, she also made me feel very loved by giving me kisses and playing with me the entire night. LOVE YOU, STELLS!
I am so excited to be going home to Brasil for 19 days. I can't wait to see my mom and dad and grandpa and my cousins and the maids and my uncle and hell, even the Russian! I want to ride that stallion again (the Russian is not a stallion, her horse is the stallion. Just want to clear that up), maybe I won't get bucked off this time. I chose to spend Thanksgiving and Christmas with Ammon this year, and not with my fam. He better the hell feel special, that's all I'm gonna say about that. I'm so crazy about my family that I would not miss the chance of hanging out with them during xmas time for anyone else. I love my husband a whole lot, that's for sure.
I'm so glad he is home from his classy, fancy business trip. I really wished he would have bought me a hoodie with the hotel's name on it, but I did get an awesome pearl in a can with salty water and a bunch of chocolate I already ate. It was delish.
Oh and just to finalize this really lame entry, I have an awful cold. I had a fever the last few days and my nose was super bloody. When I got home from going on a rather long walk with my dawgs, I realized I had blood all over my white hoodie and I had a blood moostach. I bet people were totally trying to like, flag me down on the street. If I saw it though, I'd be like, "yeaaaah, I look HAWTT today! Look at all these people MAD DAWGGIN' me!".
Lastly, I would like to thank Miss Lacy May and Miss Kate Marie for visiting me at work. Tara and Brett also visited me once. Thanks guys! and THANKS Ann, for never stopping by, even though I was like, 5 min from your house. THANKS. Now you'll never see me in my Whole Foods beret. Sucks to be you.
xoxo

she's got ass AND class

2008-11-03T22:09:00.000-08:00

yes folks, i'm talking about myself. ass i've got enough to spare, but i feel my class is just going out the window since starting at Whole Foods. I am practically the only girl in a kitchen full of boys who, well, don't have much going on right now. and haven't ever, in my opinion. after reading that peeps thought my husband lacked class when telling Brett to do that one thing, lets just say that maybe ive been around boys too much. and unfortunatly, ive been too far from my boy toy.
work is going well though, can't complain. we've been having "dance parties" since the weather started getting chillier and let me tell you, i've got moves. i even close my eyes and like, bite my lower lip when i dance. it's rad. today wesley, sawyer and i even got a few customers to join us. i giggled like crazy. i love to giggle. i'm happy where im at. i have no money, but im happy.
i don't miss blogging though. it's weird, i go through phases. i have been so excited about ann and lacy's halloween pictures, but since no one ever put them up, im just like, eh. you know?
anyway, im sleepy, and nervous about tomorrow. vote everybody...VOTE. except if you're voting mccain...then stay home.

new J. Crew

2008-10-17T11:45:00.001-07:00

I HATE MONEY.

2008-10-17T11:40:00.000-07:00

I'm still sad about Paul Newman. Joanne once said of him, "Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat."

MY LOVE AFFAIR

2008-10-13T19:24:00.000-07:00

it's time i come clean about my recent crush. i feel awful about it, especially because i can't afford to love it. what's a girl to do?!
marc jacobs' designs and i have had many crushes and affairs during my last years of fashion love. i freaked out when marc dated a brazilian guy, it was like a small piece of me was by his side. ah, marc jacobs, why must you treat me so badly? can't you just sell your fashionable designs at target?
i know most of you won't like this purse. i totally understand and respect that. my own mother almost puked and kindly offered to get me a "purse that wasn't made out of plastic". but you know what? i slice cold cuts for 8 hours a day, i am allowed to make cool fashion choices. even wesley, the coolness of cool asian boy that works with me, has enjoyed my fashion choices as of late. he sometimes suggests more risky things for me to match, but he says overall, i have great style. same goes for my gay boss at work, who says that i wear my new scarf very well and that it goes great with my eyes and skin tone. we talked about me doing my Neti Pot ( http://www.sinucleanse.com/?source=google&group=neti&campaign=1 ) every day and different tecniques that i could try. i love my gay boss, he is so cool. i like making crazy fashion choices. like my emerald green cords, for example. my mom hates them, ammon hates them, but wesley and i love them. what can i say? i am a fashion rebel at heart who enjoys all things j. crew and marc jacobs. BUT i buy their more risky things. cause i'm a rebel. duh.

sad blog

2008-10-07T11:39:00.001-07:00

what a sad little blog, no posts! wah wah wah!
so much has been happening, i have had no time to write! i would also like to mention that Milana came in to my work yesterday. holy shit, how adorable are her and her daughter!? i was so excited to see them. and john comes in sometimes...i told ammon i feel super cool when people go out of their way to come and say hi to me. i have made quite a few costumer friends at work, but nothing beats seeing John and Milana. love love love them. and love how nice they are! when my boss gets fired (fingers crossed!), i'll tell everybody about all the crazy stuff he does...but until then, i'll keep my mouth shut.
yesterday i got yelled at so bad (by a costumer) that my manager came and apologized about it to me. the guy, this crazy crazy insane guy, got pissed because we are inconsistant with our pizza crusts. yeah. this douche face place an order for a half pepperoni, half maguerita pizza and i had to make it for him. i like making pizza, i think rolling out dough is fun, but i wanted to go home at 9:30...not roll out pizza. anyway, this guy comes in and the pizza was in the oven. i see him checking out our other pizzas, and he mentions how some of the crust is super thin, and some of it is thicker. the dough comes portioned out to us, we just roll the damn things out. i told him that. he rolled his eyes at me. so his pizza comes out, i weigh it, and it comes to $16.99. WOAH. the guy shat his pants. he let me (and the entire whole foods store) know that the pizza in park city is not only better looking, it is also $3 cheaper. $3, woah...that's enough to what? buy yourself a Snickers? seriously. i told him i was really sorry but i didn't choose the pricing on the pizzas. and as soon as i noticed that the nicer i was, the more pissed he got, i went to town. i was miss niceness of the world. i just kept on apologizing and smiling. things got out of hand when he said "damn it", so i went and got management. it was funny, though. i am getting used to assholes at work. and for a person to lose it because of pizza dough?! can you imagine the way this dick breath treats his family? jeez.
my mom is in town and i am loving it. coming home to Ammon AND my mom is da boooomb! love love love it.
i hope you guys are all having a good week. please tell John and Milana i love it that they come visit me. and you guys are so lucky to have normal bosses. really. ask ammon what my boss got caught doing in the parking lot this week.

AH!

2008-10-02T23:25:00.000-07:00

LOOKS JUST LIKE THE TOONCE!

work work work

2008-10-02T20:42:00.000-07:00

i work too much. not anything else has been going on, other than the fact my momma is coming to town on SUNDAAAY! woah! excitement galore!
i just want to tell you all about a guy that came in to work yesterday. so i was working at the juice and java part but my "team mate" wesley had gone pee, so i was in charge of his sandwich station as well. i LOVE making sandwiches for people. and i love it when they want to create their own sandwich. and i love making their sandwiches all huge, cause they get all excited (but I only make them huge if they are nice, if the person is not nice i make sure to get crappy pieces of chicken and lettuce). anyway, this guy wanted a slice of pizza, not a sandwich. so i see this guy coming up and i was like, great, this guy is gonna be awesome. so he says hi to me, asks me how im doing. he tells me he is doing AWESOME. yeah. i started feeling a little uncomfortable so i ask him what he wanted, and he says pizza. i ask him what slice he wants and he says (get ready...) "THIS BIG BAD BOY WANTS A BIG, BAD SLICE!" ooooh dear. ew. and to make matters worse, i have had a lot of lesbians hit on me lately. especially when i wear my bangs down. my mom told me i need to switch my deodorant or perfume. or both.
sarah palin makes me nervous. and i hates how she says "darn" and "gosh darn it". she scares me. can you imagine this woman in charge of anything? id be scared of having her just as a neighbor. ugh.
ps: i heard lacy is voting mccain/palin.

2008-10-01T12:20:00.000-07:00

so the thing i like to do best when i have a shitty week is make fun of other people. people who think they are cool, especially.
that's my aunt. she's from russia. she is 50 years old. yes, 50. botox much? that's her horse. he bucked me off. he is a mean stallion. he sure is pretty though. my aunt thinks she is a supermodel and that everybody loves her. they don't, though. she got a Faberge Egg for her birthday. she thinks she is royalty. she is an awful dresser.
i know it might sound like i am jealous of her (i am just jealous of her for being extremely rich and having that gorgeous horse) but i'm not. she treats my cousins like shit and wants my uncle all to herself.
i just had to vent. thanks.

daddy P

2008-09-27T10:08:00.001-07:00

Paul Newman died and I'm CRUSHED. I know I didn't know him, but I did see him quite a few times in my life. I never had the guts to talk to him, but he always seemed in a good mood. Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid is one of my favorite films of all time. And my dad's, as well. I've seen it at least 20 times. I remember in 2006, when I worked at the Sundance Film Festival, Paul Newman was here. And just the day before, I had watched Butch Cassidy. I don't know, Paul Newman just kind of seemed invincible to me. And now he died of cancer. So sad.

dogs=better than people

2008-09-26T22:34:00.001-07:00

Ten-year-old Cole Massie of Los Angeles, CA, may live with cerebral palsy, but he has all the support a kid could want, thanks to a very special black Lab/golden retriever mix named Ilia.

Recently crowned ASPCA Dog of the Year as part of the 2008 Humane Awards program, Ilia performs service duties like bringing items to Cole in his wheelchair and opening and closing doors. But the pooch also has that special healing touch that can’t be taught. “He provides amazing incentive to Cole during therapies, doctor’s appointments and procedures,” says Cole’s mom, Michelle Massie. “He calms, inspires and motivates my son far better than anyone ever has."

Or, as Cole sums it up: "I like when he lies next to me in bed at night and we listen to Harry Potter on CD, and that he helps to clean me when I'm in the bath by licking my face and arms. He's my furry brother and best friend—and a serious bed hog!

This past July, three years after boy and dog were paired by the nonprofit Canine Companions for Independence, Cole was faced with a difficult, but life-changing surgery. “He had walked on his toes, and his feet were totally rolled in,” says Massie. “The operation would allow him to use his feet and free him of the wheelchair.”

“Cole was frightened by the idea of surgery at first,” remembers Massie. “We explained how much more independent he’d be afterward, but he wasn’t buying it. Finally, we told him that if he had this procedure, there was a very good chance he’d be able to walk Ilia on his own—with no parents and no walker." After that, says Massie, "Cole would stroke the dog’s head in bed each night and whisper, 'I will walk you, Ilia. I will walk you.'"

After much coaxing, Cole underwent the surgery in Summit, NJ, and Ilia traveled more than 7,000 miles to be by the boy's side. The ten-year-old is now on his way to becoming an independent walker—and his dedicated service dog will be with him every step.

The entire family will attend the ASPCA Humane Awards Luncheon in New York City this October 30, where Ilia will be honored along with seven other extraordinary animals and people.

P.S. We'd like to remind you, pet lovers, that even heroes have their quirks. As Massie reveals, “Ilia knows 46 commands, but he won’t fetch!”

atchoo!

2008-09-24T20:16:00.000-07:00

guess who has the flu or some kind of cold virus? me.
i have a lot to say but honestly, i am so not in the mood. i just found something out that i have have have to share with all you GG fans out there:

does anyone recognize those two? it's effing CHUCK and DREW BARRYMORE! what in the world! blair is gonna be PISSED when she finds out.

highlights of my work today:

Some like, royal Whole Foods master guy was in town and he let us know he was coming into the store about 30 min prior to his awesome arrival. it was chaos in there, and i loved every minute. my favorite part was when the guy shook my hand and it had pesto on it, so he wiped it on his pants. HAHAHA!

Danielle, the gorgeous vegan-master girl has a crush on Wesley, the super cool 19 year old that works with me and dresses like, AMAZINGLY. it is so cute to see them flirting. Wes is freaking out so bad over Danielle that he will not stop talking about her, and everything i try to tell him he changes into something about D. I was telling Wes I still need to learn how to make a few diff kinds of smoothies and Danielle needs to train me, and Wes said (in front of a costumer) "Danielle can train me anytime she wants....if she is naked and at my house." yeah. the lady that heard him wasn't too into it.

Ammon and I have a joke about this old guy that lives in a building next to ours. The guy had a chocolate lab that passed away and he kind of gave me a too-long-of-a-hug when i went to say hi to him one day. Poor guy did nothing to deserve our mean comments, but he gets them anyway. So the game we play in honor of our neighbor is called "would you rather...". This game obviously gets really really gross and out of hand, but Ammon and I always surprise ourselves with our uniqueness. I managed to gross Ammon out so bad that I thought he was going to make himself go blind from all the nervous eye-scratching. And this would only be gross to Ammon, because to most people, anal sex with an old man or eating their poo is far more terrible than this. So I asked Ammon: would you rather give ______ a kiss on the neck or a pedicure? All hell broke loose as soon as I mentioned the word PEDICURE. We play this game before we go to bed, but this night he even had to get up and get a drink of water before he turned off the lights. That's how intense it was. OH and on a side note, Lacy Lace mentioned how annoing it is when couples say "i love you" all the time and stuff, and i completly agree. i used to be all into the verbal aspect of a relationship, but after i met Ammon it all changed. Yes, sometimes ammon and I would love to punch each other in the face, but holy shit do we love each other. And we don't have to get all sappy about it either, which kicks some ass.

i am reallly sick, guys. and tomorrow is ammon's birthday, which i would love to celebrate in health but it's just not gonna happen.

my mom gets here on sunday. i am freaking out. FREAKING out. my mom is DA BOMB! that's cute, "MY MOM IS DA BOMB".

this post doesnt make sense. im tired. i got home last night from work at 11:30pm and had to be at work at 7am today. i have seen John (the nice boss guy from the IRB) twice, but i think he only saw me once. what a nice guy! my goodness. everyone at work is sick, too. the cooks were even wearing those mask things. wah wah wah.

come visit me guys!

TONIGHT!

2008-09-20T07:44:00.000-07:00

Tara, Brett and Ammon are coming to Whole Foods to have dinner with me tonight. Has anyone else (ANN, LACY, JACK, and even ANNIE or KATE?!) even MENTIONED they want to come and visit me? No. Thanks a lot, everybody.
Last night was another hilarious night. I am just going to really get into the highlights because I want to take a nap in a minute.
2 people didn't show up to work yesterday. Yeah. Good idea, fuck faces. Everything was KRAZY, from beginning to end. We had no stuff sliced for sandwiches, no pizzas made, no coffee in the coffee thing holder that you have to PUMP to make come out. Complete disaster. This one guy wanted a BLT and since we were out of bacon, I couldn't cater to the baby's needs. So the dude huffs all loud, like his world is caving in, says he doesn't want me to make him anything else and when I tell him to have a good day (I have to admit I kind of did the "have a good day!" with a huge smile on my face on purpose) he tells me, in his heavy New York accent, "YEAH, WHATEVAH". I had to turn around so he wouldn't see me laughing. Go home and make yourself a BLT, loser! I got bigger and better things on my hands...like reading VOGUE during my 10 minute break.
Ammon, Lacy and Ann's boss, John, was at Whole Foods yesterday. What a nice guy. My boss is an ultimate fighter with large tattoos on his neck. Nothin' wrong with that, he is actually really cool. Just sayin'.
When I was getting ready to go home yesterday, I was asked to take out the garbage. I didn't really mind, because my actual biggest nightmare is having to do dishes. We switch off and I guess my day has not come YET. So I take all the garbage in these two large rolling cans and I notice there is a party going on at Jamba Juice. Hey, btw, Whole Foods owns Jamba. Tell your friends, it's not really common knowledge yet so you'll look cool and "in the know". It's a bunch of 16 year olds and one of the girls even had a damn tiara and balloons. I actually huffed out loud and rolled my eyes. About 10 girls start walking in my direction and as one of them passes me, she goes (get ready, it's good!) "SHIT, THAT STINKS!" and her and her genius friends giggle. You would think it was some kind of joke, like when a lady told me that the panini she had in Italy was different than the one we serve at Whole Foods, but no jokes were going on here. By the way, I love it when snotty people mention Europe cause I start quizzing them about stuff (like where they were and where they ate and if they saw certain things) and they all get kind of nervous. People are dumb. Anyway, after the girl said my garbage stunk, I imagined myself taking the two largest bags out of the rolling can and holding a bag in each hand. I would start spinning like a super hero, getting faster and faster with time. After a few seconds I would be spinning so fast that the girls would be both confused and amazed at my spinning skills and that's when I would hit them in the face with the garbage bags. The bags would explode, getting chicken juice and ground up coffee beans all over their ugly, cheap outfits. I would smile and go about my business.
Enjoy your Saturday night guys, I have next Saturday OFF! FUCK YEAH!
Hey Ann, I wore my TEAM BLAIR shirt to work yesterday and this really sassy cook said, "WHO THE FUCK IS BLAIR AND WHY THE FUCK ARE YO ON HER TEAM?". Sad. So sad.

gross

2008-09-20T07:43:00.000-07:00

this guy is so weird!

stuff

2008-09-18T19:06:00.000-07:00

I'm bored. Please don't read my survey if you don't want to. It will be lame.

1. Do you like blue cheese? I LIKE MOST CHEESE, LIKE 99% OF ALL CHEESES, BUT NOT BLUE.
2. Your Favorite Shoes? UGGS!
3. Do you own a gun? NO.
4. Your favorite song? I DONT THINK I HAVE A FAVORITE!
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? NAH...PROBABLY BECAUSE NOTHING REALLY SCARY HAS EVER HAPPENED TO ME, NOT EVEN A CAVITY.
6. What do you think of hot dogs? I LOVE THE DAMN THINGS! BUT I WILL BE A VEGETARIAN AGAIN, OH YES, I WILL BE A VEGETARIAN AGAIN.
7. Favorite Christmas song? SLEIGH RIDE!
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? DOUBLE SHOT OF ESPRESSO, MADE BY ME!
9. Can you do push ups? YES.
10. Are you afraid of flying? NOT REALLY. MORE JUST ANNOYED/BORED BY IT.
11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? THE CARTIER WATCH MY GRANDPA GAVE ME.
12. Favorite hobby? HORSEBACK RIDING
13. Animals: love them or hate them? LOVE THEM MORE THAN I LOVE PEOPLE.
14. Do you have ADD? NO...?
15. What do you hate about yourself? I WISH I WAS LESS SENSITIVE AND DIDNT LOVE ANIMALS AS MUCH AS I DO.
16. What is your middle name? AUGUSTA. AFTER A PORSCHE ENGINE. YEAH. AND MY NAME IS FLAVIA BECAUSE OF A DUCATI PART. MY DAD WAS JUST TOO MUCH.
17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment: I HATE CANDY AND THE WAY IT MAKES ME FEEL AFTER I EAT WAY TOO MUCH OF IT. I IWSH MY MOM WAS HERE. I WISH BRASIL WAS A CAR RIDE AWAY.
18. What's your favorite number? 11
19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? WATER, COFFEE AND LEMONAIDE.
20. Current worry right now? WORK TOMORROW...UGH
21. Current hate right now? MY LAZYNESS WITH YOGA AND RUNNING.
22. Favorite place to be? MY COUNTRY.
23. How did you bring in the New Year? AT HOME IN BRASIL AND JUMPING IN THE SWIMMING POOL AT MIDNIGHT TO WATCH THE FIREWORKS IN THE SKY! WOOHOO
24. Where would you like to go? BRASIL.
25. Bad habits: HMMM...I DON'T KNOW! MY PROCRASTINATION?
26. Do you own slippers? YES, UGG ONES!
27. What shirt are you wearing? ONE FROM MY FAVORITE BRASILIAN RESTAURANT!
28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? I DIDN'T LIKE IT. COTTON IS MORE MY THING.
29. Can you whistle? SURE CAN!
30. Favorite color? GREEN AT THE MOMENT.
31. Would you be a pirate? NO. I WOULD BE A FILM DIRECTOR, THOUGH.
32. What songs do you sing in the shower? I DON'T REALLY SING IN THE SHOWER...OUTSIDE THE SHOWER IS MORE MY THING.
33. Favorite girl's name? LUCY IS KINDA CUTE. RUBY? PETUNIA.
34. Favorite boy's name? BOOMER. WOOF!
35. What's in your pocket right now? NOTHING, MY BOXERS DONT HAVE POCKETS.
36. Last thing that made you laugh? BOOMER HOWLING AT ME WHILE I SANG A SONG FROM LITTLE MERMAID. THATS HOW GREAT OF A SINGER I AM, I MAKE MY PUP HOWL.
37 . Best bed sheets as a child? HOLY SHIT MY CABBAGE PATCH KIDS ONE! WOW, THOSE WERE THE DAYS...
38. Worst injury you've ever had? MY MANY HORSE-JUMPING FALLS.
40. How many TVs do you have in your house? 1!
41. Who is your loudest friend? NONE OF MY FRIENDS ARE LOUD.
42. How many dogs do you have? OOOH! I AM GOING TO NAME ALL THE DOGS IVE HAD, BECAUSE THEY WILL ALWAYS BE MINE. HUTCH, MY FIRST DOG, WAS A GOLDEN RETRIEVER AND DIED WHEN HE WAS 15. HERSHEY, A CHOCOLATE LAB, DIED WHEN SHE WAS 16. WAFFLES, A YELLOW LAB, IS 10 AND LIVES IN BRASIL WITH MY MOM AND SAME WITH NOAH, A WILD GOLDEN RETRIEVER WHO IS ALMOST 2. AND THEN I HAVE BOOMER, MY YELLOW LAB, WHO IS ABOUT 5 AND PETUNIA, A JACK RUSSELL TERRIER WHO IS ABOUT 6.
43. Does someone have a crush on you? I HAVE NO CLUE. I DONT THINK IM VERY CRUSH-WORTHY.
44. Favorite Book? JONATHAN LIVINGSTON SEAGULL.
45. Partying hard or Laying low? NO PARTYING, IM TOO OLD THESE DAYS.
46. What is your favorite candy? ANYTHING. LOVE IT ALL.
.47. Favorite Sports Team? I LIKE BRASILIAN SOCCER.
49. What were you doing 12 AM last night? SLEEPING.
50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? YAY, NO WORK!
51. If you are married, where did you meet your WIFE/HUSBAND? IM NOT TELLING THIS STORY YET AGAIN.

meow!

2008-09-18T06:40:00.000-07:00

Hi guys!
Yesterday work was fun. It is slowly getting better, as I get more and more used to being looked at strangely by customers. Slicing gross deli meat, making sandwiches and sometimes being over at the smoothie and coffee part I guess means you aren't cool to some people. Good thing I have friends who still love me just the same as when I didn't have a job. Heehee. And I've been making some friends at work, too! I have been invited to go out with them twice. I am so dead after standing up for 8 hours though, honestly the last thing on my mind is drunk karaoke at some awesome bar.
I have a great story that happened to me yesterday, during lunch. I am going to try my hardest to be as descriptive as possible, because this story is very cool and you need to picture the full on snottyness that is this lady.
As I sit over by the juice and java bar thing, I see a lady walking towards Abby and I. Abby is this totally gorgeous, totally nice girl I met yesterday and who I have apparently fooled into thinking I am cool like her. Anyway, here comes this lady. She had on black pumps (LAAACYYYY!!!), black tight leggins and a black sweater-shirt with a thick gold belt around her waist to accentutate her figure. Keep in mind this lady is around 75 years old. She had a shitload make up on as well. She starts talking to Abby and I and asks Abby (who was at the little register) to weight her salad from the salad bar. There was practically no salad, and a smidge of tuna was in the corner. It looked like cat food. I hate tuna unless it's raw, like sushi tuna. Anyway, the lady asks where the water was. It was right in front of her, in one of those jar things that you have to push the little lever down for the water to come out. What does the lady do? She holds her glass up to the water thing and LOOKS AT ME, SO I WILL PUMP THE DAM WATER FOR HER! I nearly peed my pants. I was in total shock! I didnt even have time to think about what I was doing, I just pumped it for her (sounds like I did a dirty dance number for her or something! I "pumped it for her"! hahaha) and looked at Abby. So then, the lady, who I later found out is known as "Botox Face Lady" by all employess at Whole Foods says "I liked the old water filter better." I was busy looking down at the register, so what does Botox Face say? "ARE YOU HEARING ME?!" Holy shit! I said I was and I was sorry to hear about her water issues. Bummer for her. Maybe she can get more botox to make herself feel better when she is done with her smidge of tuna? So Abby and I giggle as Botox Face leaves and Danielle, equally gorgeous and sweet and vegan queen master asks us if we realize who that is. We didn't. Well, turns out Botox Face is....are you guys ready? This is HUGE. I seriously gasped out loud, Ann style. Okay, so Botox Face is THE ORIGINAL CATWOMAN! From like, Batman and Robin in the 70's! There was some tv show or something and she was it, she is the real deal! We even saw 2 people asking her for autographs while we giggled at our celebrity encounter.
Who says Whole Foods is all bad? HA!

BEST TUESDAY EVER

2008-09-16T17:49:00.000-07:00

What did I do today? I ate green tea ice cream for breakfast, watched Gossip Girl afterwards, and once that lovely hour was over I took a nap. Woke up, took Boomie to the vet, and when I got back there was a package from Ann. I was secretly hoping for something related to Gossip Girl, but you can't be too picky. Well, turns out Ann IS the Serena to my Blair...what was in the package? A tshirt that says TEAM BLAIR on it. Holy shit, how is that not THE most perfect thing ever? It is literally the coolest thing I have ever gotten in the mail and not picked out myself. Only a fellow GG fan such as Ann would know what to get a girl like me.
Ann, you rock me like a hurricane. Thank you. It was just what I needed. You have made not only my day, but my entire month.

few things...

2008-09-15T19:00:00.000-07:00

I'd like to start off this post by talking about my blog friend Annie. She and I "know" each other because of Lacy. Lacy rocks my world, btw. Anyway, I was snooping around in Annie's blog (which technically wasn't really snooping, since we "know" each other) when I came across a comment made by one of her friends saying I was a STRANGER. I would name this friend of hers, but I am too lazy to go and check. this friend of Annie's is pretty lame, in my opinion. What, is she Annie's Friend Police? Must she know of Annie's whereabouts? Jeez. Keep it up, Friend Police, your doing a great job.
Today I went into Ammon's work and when I went passed Ann's office, I saw her BE NICE sign. I giggle every time I see it. I think of that day, way back when, when all seemed doomed and hopeless. Ah, nothing like giving things time.
I have been so sensitive the last couple of days that I almost feel like I could be pregnant. No people, I'm not pregnant nor will I ever be, I am just sensitive like one of those pregnant ladies. I wish I could have an excuse for my wussiness other than mean customers at work, but the truth is I don't. I took the dogs out to pee before bed time last night and when I noticed little Boomie was eating one of those really cute leaf-shaped bugs (katie something...?), I started crying. Yeah, I know. I cried and cried, went to bed super late after crying to Ammon for two hours and when my alarm went off at 5am for work, I slept through it. Ammon woke me up at 6am and I barely had time to shower and brush the chompers. But to my surprise, what do I see as soon as I step outside? The katie whatever bug, standing up on her own and making little twitter sounds with her adorable wings. What happened after that? I cried. Scooped the little thing in my hands (I am PETRIFIED of touching bugs, so this took a lot of love) and took her over to the bushes. Then, as I got closer to work, the moon was out and the sky was so perfectly clear...so I thought of my fam in Brasil and cried some more. Seriously, what is wrong with me?
Work is going a lot better though and I think I am learning how to deal with things better. The coffee there is really good and kept me awake for most of my shift. I will hopefully start feeling entertained by the asshole costumers as opposed to crying about them to Amms when I get home. Ammon, btw, has once again amazed me with his patience and kindness. I am so sick of being a baby that I told myself if I can do better, I will reward my closet with a goodie. Perhaps a Marc Jacobs goodie. Mmm, Marc Jacobs.
PS: Annie, tell your Friend Police friend that she is dumb.
pss: thanks Jack and Ann, for making me feel better today.

wah wah wah

2008-09-14T06:58:00.000-07:00

My first day sucked. That's why I didn't blog yesterday or the day before. All I can say is, please remember to not be complete fucker to people who are on the other side of the counter, because believe me, they are just as good as you...and in my case, I'm probably smarter, funnier AND have a better sense of style than you.
I am working at the deli, sandwich and juice and java bar at Whole Foods. I love everybody that works there. EVERYBODY. Random employees just come up and say hi. It's the shit. And there is this guy named Wesley who is like, the king of all cool 19 year olds. He dresses cool, he looks cool...he is one cool mother fucker. If you saw him down the street, I promise you'd be like WOAH. We laugh all day long.
So Wes and I were chilling, slicing some stuff for the sandwich bar when this guy, apparently from Bosnia, asked me to slice some Chipotle Turkey for him. Bastard, I'll never forget that guy. Anyway, first off, the slicer is the scariest thing ever. I'm not shitting you, that thing is sharp and makes me feel like at any moment my finger will be chopped off. So yeah, I grab the turkey for the fucker, asked him if he wanted it thin, he said yes. I slice it for him, a whole pound, and the guy goes CRAZY on me. NO NO NO NO, YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO ANYTHING! THIS IS FALLING APART, I DON'T WANT THIS TURKEY! MAKE THE SLICES WIDER, WIDER! MY WIFE IS GOING TO BE VERY UPSET ABOUT THIS!!! Yeah. laugh about it...I am laughing now, but I didn't laugh then. I actually cried when I got home. It's hard to have people think you are shit because you work at the deli counter or just at a grocery store. This other snotty lady came up to me (I also put food in little containers...we have like wild rice and tofu and stuff that you can just get ready) and she goes, I HAVE TWO POT LUCK DINNERS TONIGHT, I'M GOING TO BE EXAUSTED. Yeah lady, what a joyous life you have...two fucking pot luck dinners?! WOAH, that's like. the equivalent of being invited over to Demi Moore and Ashton's house for a party.
But yesterday was GREAT. I got to be in a little corner and make sandwiches and not really help anyone. EW I scooped gross egg salad with an ice cream scoop and put it on the bread. It stunk. I was fun, though! And then while I was watching the case so Wes could go smoke outside (told you he was cool...cool people smoke cigs!) some 13 year old girls started talking to me. These two little ladies made my fucking night. They told me I was pretty. They loved my earings. They thought the fact I was from Brasil was like, the coolest thing ever...so I hooked the two ladies up! I got them free cupcakes and chips. That's what I'm talking about...the two C's. You are nice to me, I am nice to you.
I work tonight again AND next Fri, Sat and Sun. Hopefully the weekend after that I will be free. I will take some pictures soon so you guys can see how bitchin' my job is. If anyone wants to come in and visit, please do! :)

TGIF!

2008-09-12T06:48:00.001-07:00

So today will be my first day at work...wish me luck! From 2:30-10:30pm. WOAH. That's a whole lot of standing.
Now, about the prizes...I need to get them this weekend, I'm hoping. I already know what I'm getting everybody (even you, Jack!) so that will be easy, but I just need to find time to go to the mall.
I'll blog about today tomorrow, because I'm sure I will want to go to bed as soon as I get home.
Yes Tara, it's a lot of fiber, but since I eat a lot of fruit nothing happened. Were you hoping I got diarrhea? Thanks.

Danger Zone!

2008-09-10T21:15:00.000-07:00

So, when foods are between 41 degrees and 140 degrees, those are known as the Danger Zone temperatures. I got my Food Handler's permit today. I can handle your food better than you can.
I had so much fun getting trained at Whole Foods. Everyone is cute and nice and hip. I'll be the lame one behind the counter. Easy to spot.
My day was actually going perfect until one of the managers (a nice one, actually) from Banana called to ask me why I wasn't working, since my shift started like 3 hours ago. Uuuh...my second shift EVER in a month and a half. AND I had called last night to tell my less of a douche manager that I was getting trained for an actual job until 10pm today and couldn't work. How annoying! Now I'm going to feel all dumb going in on Friday to pick up my check. And I am going to exchange Brett's gift at another Banana. I hate Banana! I love Whole Foods. I ate like 5 peaches today while I was getting trained. Their produce rocks my world.
I am going to try to get transfered to the 6th south location, because that's the actual one I applied for. If I can't, then I will wait for an opening. I don't mind the drive if it means I get to work at Whole Foods. I effing love that place. Did I mention I get paid vacation? Yeah. Suck on that, Banana.

CONTEST!

2008-09-08T20:28:00.000-07:00

So, since I won Ann's contest (thanks to my new cyber friend, Jessica!) , it is my turn to do my own! I won't reveal the prize, but I promise it will be good.

I am obssessed with all things relating to Brasil. Come up with a phrase in Portuguese and my favorite (and the one that makes the most sense) will take the prize.

c'mon guys, please try to win the prize...i promise promise promise it will be good! you won't regret it.

too cute for words!

2008-09-08T20:09:00.000-07:00

sooo, which shoes would YOU pick for your job? it's just too hard to choose.
not much happened during my day, i just signed a bunch of papers and met people that work at Whole Foods. i loved everyone i met. normail, mature people. people that have mouths to feed at home and aren't worried about being cool. just what i wanted.
i'll post more tomorrow, when i have neat things to write about orientation and about today's episode of GG, which i haven't watched yet.
xoxo

Eric Damon

2008-09-08T10:15:00.000-07:00

I couldn't find a picture of him, but even if you have never heard the name before, I bet you will WISH you were him. Who is Eric Damon? The legend, the MYTH? Eric Damon, my sweet readers, is the one and only costume designer for Gossip Girl. I would quit my Whole Foods job to work with/for him.

Toonces

2008-09-07T21:11:00.000-07:00

Life

2008-09-07T20:56:00.000-07:00

So my fam is super Catholic and we have this saying that goes something like (sounds way better in Italian...) "Jesus might scare you a little bit, but he'll never leave you hangin'". That's the like, slang translation. Haha. Anyway, I feel like that saying has been oh-so-true for me the last month or so. And I feel awful saying that, because I know I am so much more fortunate than so many people...but I still feel the saying applies to me. Wow, that sentence is CRAP. I'm not changing it, though.
I am really excited about my Whole Foods job. I thought someone would post about the radicalness of the song I chose to go along with the Whole Foods logo, but maybe I'm just the only one that likes that song. When I thought of putting that song up, I listened to it three times and just laughed...Ammon thinks I'm such a doofus. But I was so excited and so proud of myself for getting that damn job that everything seemed funny at that moment. I have to go to Whole Foods tomorrow to do paperwork and I cannot WAIT! I am even going to be getting a pair of CROCS (you read right...CROCS!) to keep me company during my hours upon ours of standing up. I havent decided on the color yet, we'll see. The Vogue reader in me says black, though.
Thanks to Ann, Lacy, Brett, Tara, Ammon, Boomer, Petunia and my lovely parents for listening to me whine about getting a job. OH and btw, Tucker offered me a FULL TIME position. What the fuck.
OH and I'd like to give a special shout out to Annie, who I have heard occasionaly reads my blog. Lacy loves you, Annie, so you are automatically radical in my book. Oh and I love that one cake you made...awesome.
I'll post tomorrow to let everybody know how awesome of a time I had filling out papers at my new job! WOOHOO!

where do YOU work?

2008-09-03T22:00:00.000-07:00

OMG day

2008-09-03T21:39:00.000-07:00

Get ready, cause this will prob be my best post ever. all the rest will just be average after this. Kind of like when Kevin Spacey did American Beauty.
So, I went to J. Crew today to chat with my friend and after, I was going into "that one store I work at" to return a shirt that looked FUG on me. So I sat and chatted with Lindsay (love that girl) and then made my way to "that one store". I got there and my manager goes, "you realize your shift starts on 5 minutes, right?" OOOOOOH my goodness. Did I get my sched via email? No. Did someone call me? No. I was told I'd get my schedule TOMORROW. Thank you Jesus, for having me go in and exchange that awful shirt. So I get changed in the back (I had bought a sweater and some adorable flats at Gap earlier, so I was totally on the ball), and off to the floor I went. I started out pretty shy, for the first 30 minutes I felt stupid even asking people how they were doing. That obviously all changed when a storm of people from some scam thing (like Xango and shit like that) came in. I guess there is a convention this weekend. I got proposed in marriage, my hand kissed twice and all of this was in only 15 minutes. I feel like fuckin' Miss America today. Total babe. Some total weirdos came in to the store too, it was so weird. And people leave all this shit in the dressing room, like no one will ever have to go in there and fold all their damn shirts and sweaters. UGH. But I had a REALLY good time. I was the only girl with 6, yes SIX gay guys and I could not have laughed more during those 5 hours. One of the guys (I'm not writ ting his name down for obvious reasons but I will tell it to you later, because it is an AWFUL name)kept checking himself out in the mirror the entire night. He kind of has that emo-spikey looking deal and he would like, do this little hip pop to the side and fix his hair. And he was SO moody...he rolled his eyes at me at least twice when I asked him questions. SHEESH! The other guy called me his LAMB (!!!) the entire night...either that, or "Flavia, my love". I need to have more people call me Lamb. Maybe I should change my blog to "The Lamb Blog". He would look at certain things before we put them away and was like, "LOOK THIS IS AWFUL MESS! THIS WOULDN'T EVEN LOOK GOOD ON KATE MOSS." He is a model for the one store I work at, so he is like, WOAH good looking. He told me a lot of stuff about his boyfriend. I wanted to ask him if anal sex really hurts as bad as I think it does, but I didn't dare. He would have totally been fine with answering though, he is cool like that. Then, my gay manager (not Tucker) got into a fight with the emo hair guy and emo hair started CRYING. I'm not even kidding. When I realized what had gone on, my mouth was open and I had rested all the items I was supposed to put back on the table. Oops. It's like a car wreck though, it's human to look at certain things. This lady came in with her daughter to look at black dresses and I almost started crying. They were so cute and really reminded of my mom and I, back in the ole days. OH and there were so many raunchy people that came in! JEEZ guys, you're SHOPPING! Turn that damn frown upside down. Haha and this really handsome older black guy liked a shirt that was kind of similar to one that was on sale, and he asked me if I could give him the sale price on the shirt that wasn't on sale because the fabric is kind of the same. Nice try, dude. And like I have any control over that, anyway.
Man, what a fun day. Time went by really fast and although my feet are sore and tired, I loved getting asked what my opinion on outfits were. And people totally listened, like I was Anna Wintour or something (she's the editor of Vogue, btw). And guys asked my opinion, too. About shirts, ties, pants...wow. I felt awesome.
Maybe my post isn't that awesome, I guess you had to be there to get the full effect of my one and only work day. I quit tomorrow. Our schedules came out and today is the only day I work all week. Yeah. Lord knows how these people pay their bills working only 5 hours a week.

YAY

2008-09-02T21:05:00.000-07:00

Ann, thanks for tagging me. I love being tagged. And when you wrote "ditto" on the comments, it reminded me of when Whoopy Goldberg Says "Uh uh huh DITTO?! ugh uh ugh " on Ghost when Patrick Swayze tells her to tell Demi that he loves her too on that one scene...I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. For your birthday, have Ammon do it for you. I doubt he will, but he does THE BEST impersonation of that scene EVER. Oscar-worthy.

1. Did you date someone from your school? No, we were all best friends.

2. What kind of car did you drive? BMW X5

3. What was the most embarrassing moment of HS? Going places after school in my uniform...my mom LOVED inviting me to go grocery shopping as soon as we got home, and I have no idea why but I was too lazy to change my clothes.

4. Were you a party animal? Mmmm at times...I was a total party animal during my high school summers in Europe and in Brazil. people don't know how to party in Utah, sorry.

5. Were you considered a flirt? Maybe? I'm not sure...

6. Were you in band, orchestra, or choir? CHOIR! We sang at Disneyland and went to competitions every year. We kicked ass.

7. Were you a nerd? Yes and no...I was a nerd compared to my public high school friends, but I was considered pretty normal at my school. People at Meridian would compete to see who would get the best grades, and I like a little friendly competition.

8. Were you on any varsity teams? Soccer and Volleyball.

9. Did you get suspended/expelled? No...but I came pretty close a few times.

10. Can you still sing the fight song? No fight songs...bummer.

11. Who were your favorite teachers? Mr. Neil and Mrs. Ballard.

12. Where did you sit during lunch? We didn't have a lunch room, so we couldn't eat there. We went out every day.

13. School mascot? Mongoose!

14. Did you go to homecoming, and with who? Uh...I went to every dance but I can't remember with who! There was never much asking, we just all went together. That's what happens when your graduating class has 13 people in it.

15. If you could go back and do it again, would you? Actually, I would. I loved having no responsibilities.

16. What do you remember most about graduation? I almost didn't graduate, I flunked English. I was really sick of school and didn't like my English teacher, so I got A's in everything and flunked English. Awesome.

17. Where did you go senior skip day? We didn't have that. But when I did skip school, I would go to the movies. Ah, always the Film nerd.

18. Were you in any clubs? Chess Club and Equestrian Team every summer in Brazil.

19. Have you gained some weight since then? I'm an emotional eater, so I gain and lose like 10lbs all the time. I don't remember how much I weighed then, but when I ordered my white dress from Bloomingdale's it was a size 4.

20. Who was your prom date? The only date I remember for Prom was this guy named Justin Tittlefitz (nicknamed "Fiddletits" by everybody, obvs) who was this amazing genius and I always had a great time with. I only beat him at chess once, and I never let him forget it. I miss him! Last I heard he was a total druggie.

21. Are you planning on going to your 10 year reunion? I still see everyone that matters (Scott, Ryan, Jake and Gerard) so prob not.

22. Looking back, what advice would you give yourself? Have more fun, don't worry about your friends so much and read things other than Vogue.

friends

2008-09-01T12:49:00.001-07:00

i love friends. we should all have friends. especially friends like i have. i loved tonight. way more than i should have, maybe. lacy and ann are amazing in every way. i am so glad i suckered ammon into marrying me so i could not only get a green card and good health insurance from the U, but also hang out with all his awesome bookstore friends. yesss.

i am oh so blessed

2008-08-29T21:20:00.000-07:00

You know how you American people love to say "count your blessings"? Well, let me tell you...I lost count of mine a long time ago. As if having an amazing family isn't enough, Jesus also gave me these two bitchin' dogs to call my own. This post is dedicated to them, my sweet little bundles of love.
Petunia came into my life when we needed each other the most. She was in death row, and I was a mess. Having just moved here and missing the fam and friends like crazy, I was nothing short of a wreck. Of course Ammon helped, but he was also trying to get used to me being there and well...it was just insane in the membraine (INSANE IN THE BRAIN!). I decided to volunteer for No More Homeless Pets in Utah thinking I would be dog-petting and dog-walking, but instead I was stuck in an office, licking stamps and making phone calls to people who wanted nothing to do with me. Or pets, for that matter. After a week of that, I signed up to help at a Petsmart Adoption thing. Ammon and I had talked about how I should just focus on school and get a dog later, so I had no plans when I arrived at Petsmart on that beautiful, sunny day. As soon as I walked in, my heart started beating really fast and I felt like I was going to cry. So many great dogs without homes...why are people so irresponsible? I am still trying to figure it all out. Anyway, my job was to clean pee and poo (and I have no problem doing that...but if it's a baby's poo, I will not touch it with a gloved hand for less than $300) and take the pups out of their crates for walks around the parking lot. I hadn't really noticed Petunia until it came to be her turn to get walked. Her crate was on top of another dog's crate, and I was afraid she was going to tip it over from running around in circles in there. No, her crate was not big...she was just crazy and full of energy. So I got her out and just thought she was perfect. Her name was Katie. Totally cute, perfect Jack Russell. I read her info sheet and it stated she hated kids, men, high heels, boots, cats, other dogs...everything. And at that moment, I knew she had to be mine. I talked to the adoption lady, and she said, "No no, get another one...that one has been returned 5 times already and you'll just end up returning her as well." OH, NO YOU DON'T! Don't EVER challenge me to something I KNOW I am good at. And if there is one thing I am good at, it is dealing with dogs. I get them, they get me...it works. So that's how Petunia and I came to be. And now, we're inseperable. She is perfect. If it's late at night and I'm in a hurry for her to go pee, all I have to say is "Petunia, PEE!" and she does it. When Ammon asks, she just ignores him. He doesn't even believe me when I say she does it for me. Whatever, I have nothing to prove. Petunia and I don't need to brag about her intelligence, anyway. So anyway, my girl is perfect, beautiful, smart and so sweet. She loves to cuddle and she lets me kiss her face all the time. She just sits there and sometimes even closes her eyes. When I got her, she wouldn't even let me TOUCH her. I love her so much.
So now, on to Boomer. I call him Boom or Booms for fun. Or Boomie, cause it reminds me of Bloomingdale's...and he is just that fancy, mind you.
I got Boomie for a birthday gift, last year. He came from the Labrador Rescue of Utah. Ammon is DA BOMB, Boom is the best birthday present ever. Booms had been bounced around quite a bit. The rescue told us that his original owners gave him up because he is afraid of guns and loud noises, so basically, he is useless. And so am I, I guess, because guns scare the fuck out of me. Anyway, the owner guy (hunters rock my world, btw) too Booms to the vet and asked the vet to put him to sleep, because Boomer was useless to him. Well here at home Boomer is very useful. He helps out with the laundry, takes out the trash and vacuums every Saturday. Ammon complains that Boomie is too clingy, cause he likes to lay down ON your feet. And if you sit on the floor, he wants to sit down ON your lap. I personally wouldn't have him any other way.
Today Ammon and I took my pups to the park to swim. Seeing Boomer run and Petunia get in the water is one of my favorite things in the world. My dogs mean the world to me, and I love to make them as happy as they make me.
I doubt anyone read through all of that, but I just get carried away when I talked about those two. Not many people understand my love and devotion to animals, but my life wouldn't be as meaningful if I lived it with just boring people.

DOGS RULE, HUMANS DROOL!

cuuute!

2008-08-27T12:03:00.000-07:00

so bored at midnight

2008-08-25T23:06:00.000-07:00

I am... a wuss, a blog lurker, a fan of crappy tv and an animal lover.

I know...that as long as Ammon is around, things will be fine. And believe me, I know how stupid and cheesy that sounds, but it's so true.

I once...drank too much tequila, threw up on my hands, wiped it on my clothes and went to bed.

I wish...i had more time with the ones i love.

I hate..ignorance, snottyness, and people who thing they are hot stuff.

I hear... i need to stop trusting everybody.

I crave... hugs from my mom, dad, grandpa and grandma (that now lives in heaven).

I search... for love and understanding.

I wonder... what my life would have been like if i still hung out with my snotty friends in Brasil and hadn't moved here.

I regret... not opening my eyes to reality sooner in life.

I care... more than you'll never know about things you'll never understand. wow, that was kinda deep!

I always... try to be respectful and nice to everybody, especially people who don't deserve it (what's up, tucker?).

I am not... the sweetest person ever, but believe me I try.

I believe... the children are our future.

I dance... for Boomer and Petunia all the time and they totally watch. Petunia even tilts her head!

I sing... way more than I should. And I sing crappy Aerosmith songs into Ammon's ears to annoy him. Jannie's Got a Gun is a hit at our home.

I don't always... bite my tongue when I should.

I win... at chess games, 99.9% of the time. PREZ OF THE CHESS TEAM, 1998-2000 REPRESENT!

I listen... to everybody, and I love it.

I can usually be found... eating.

I am happy about... my life! it's pretty fucked up right now (it will calm down soon, I am hoping), but it's still a lot more than I could have ever wished for.

I tag... Silky (Lacyyyyy!!!! hahahaha sorry, it's late), Ann, T-Bone and that about sums up my blog's readers! Woohoo!

I am so off to bed.

for Ammon

2008-08-25T22:49:00.000-07:00

Ammon hates this baby more than anything. Whenever he is making me mad, I pretend to be all excited and ask him to come and sit down next to me so he can see this totally cool bike I just found. And then I play this video really loud and he gets PISSED. love it!

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

2008-08-25T22:44:00.000-07:00

every time I go on a roller coaster, my gums get dry from smiling all big and then when I stop smiling, my lip gets caught on my gums. I look just like Mary Murphy.
I am so sleepy that I can't stop laughing.

FANTASTIC.

2008-08-25T11:08:00.000-07:00

So I haven't started my job yet but let me tell you, I can already tell it's going to be bad. I won't be giving any info about names because the blog world is insanely small and I am not planning on having anybody who works with me telling the other employees about it. So let's get started! Get ready to be grateful for your job.
So my boss, we'll call him Tucker (cause it rhymes with FUCKER) has been giving me attitude the moment we met. Let's go over a few of his comments, shall we?

"Oh look at this, I am TWO YEARS YOUNGER THAN YOU!", meaning "check me out, I am MANAGER of this awesome place you are going to have the privilege of working at!

"After working here for a year, you get a really cool pin. I am getting a really great watch next week for having worked here for 5 years, I can't wait!"

"Your watch is a Cartier, I would NEVER buy one of those."

Me: Tucker, can you help me with this form? English is my third language and I don't understand what it is asking...
Tucker: I am not allowed to help you, fill out what you understand.
Me: No, I just have one question.
Tucker: AGAIN, I AM NOT ALLOWED TO HELP YOU. DO YOUR BEST.
So then we call this number to report our answers and I told the lady that I didn't understand what the form wanted me to put and she then asked me why Tucksters hadn't helped me. Ah, the joys of dealing with sweet people.

I just called Tucker and asked when I can get trained. Here is our conversation:

Me: Hi Tucker, it's Flavia, how are you?
Tucker: FANTASTIC.
Me: Good! I was just wondering when I can come in and get trained...
Tucker: I had you scheduled for yesterday, WHY didn't you come in?
**FYI, Tucker gets annoyed every time I ask anything. I went into work to tell him about my hours and schedule, and he got annoyed and told me to tell him later when he had time to write it down. And on Thur when I went in for orientation, he told me to call him today (Monday) to see when I would get trained. So why the FUCK did he schedule me for yesterday?!?!?)
Me: Because no one told me...uhhhh...well, when can I get trained now?
Tucker: Call me back in two hours and we'll see.

WOW. Need I say more? I am going to cry. I felt like such an idiot! I decided I would kill him with kindness (or just plain kill him, at this point) but now, I feel like even if I do everything right, he will screw me over! Who is mean like that for no reason? Seriously! I don't think I've ever met a more arrogant man in my life. And, just to remind everybody, I will be making $7.35 an hour.
Please give me some words of encouragement, guys! C'mon!

lagoooon

2008-08-23T07:57:00.000-07:00

That's what Ann and I did last night. it was da BOOOOOOMB!
We also watched some people dancing with ugly outfits. Ann thinks one of them was Ammon. Haha.

2008-08-22T12:01:00.000-07:00

I just want to tell you guys how fucking (woohoo!) proud I am of my country getting all these medals at the olympics. And by "all these medals" I mean 8.
I think people don't understand how hard life in my country is. If you are good at a sport, your chances of getting a sponsor are pretty slim. the guy that won a bronze medal for judo said that it took him 10 years to go from brown belt to black belt because he didn't have the $100 to pay for the test that he would have to take. And that's so awesome that he didn't give up! His mom and aunt mentioned that they would only have bread and water to eat sometimes, but the guy still went to Judo practice. And then you see a guy like Michael Phelps, who does NOTHING but swim all day and people are amazed at what a good swimmer he is. c'mon.

I got a man!

2008-08-22T11:23:00.000-07:00

I love these cheesy things.

1. What is his name? Ammon Leon Pate.

2. Who eats more? He does, but he eats good-for-you food.

3. Who said "I love you" first? I'm sure I did.

4. Who is taller? It's pretty easy to beat 5'3.

5. Who is smarter? We are smart about different kinds of things. Ammon is really smart about everything that matters, like politics and interesting stuff. I am smart about not so useful things, like dog breeds and who draws for what designer. OH and I can spot a fake handbag from MILES away.

6. Who is more sensitive? I am, by a million.

7. Who does the laundry? Me. I actually kind of like it. I do ruin things, but I'm learning.

8. Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? Laying down, I'm on the right side.

9. Who pays the bills? He does! I'm awful with money.

10. Who cooks more? I'm trying to cook more, but he cooks way more than me.

11. Who is more stubborn? Both of us!

12. Who is the first to admit they are wrong? We both admit it.

13. Who has more siblings? He does.

14. Who wears the pants in this relationship? We each wear a leg of the relationship pant.

15. What do you like to do together? We like to travel a lot...and eat. OH I think ride bikes is number one, though. We love riding our bikes to the Farmer's Market every Saturday morning to eat Belgian Waffles.

16. Who eats more sweets? ME. By far.

17. Guilty pleasures? Bike stuff. He loves bikes. As soon as he bought his Bianchi, he already wanted another one. It's so cute.

18. How did you meet? I am sure everyone knows this already, but here goes: I knew his brother Elias and was hanging out with him and his friend Bryan. We had to go to his house and Ammon was there. I sat on the corner, all embarrassed because I was still wearing my lame plaid skirt and knee high uniform from school and of course, Ammon made fun of me. I got a crush on him right that second!

19. Who asked whom out first? Hmmm...there wasn't much of an asking out that went on. I asked him to come to Brasil to visit me, I think that's about as close to a date we ever got.

20. Who kissed who first? Ammon and I made a plan over the phone that I would pick him up at the airport (the first time he came to brasil) and we would kiss in the car. We would be listening to my favorite No Doubt song and it would be all perfect and stuff. So when Ammon finally got in my car from the airport, we just started kissing and giggling and it was hilarious. I just remember blushing really bad. But it was the best kiss ever.

21. Who proposed? Again, not much of a proposal. We just always knew we were gonna do it. We lived in separate apartments by Trolley Square and after about 6 months that I had been here, I got home from school and saw a guy dying from an overdose. I freaked out. Ammon came home, and we just thought, eh, we are gonna get married anyway, let's just go find a place and move outta here! Proposals sometimes seem weird to me when it comes to Ammon, cause I've known him for so long. We have more of a "best friends who have sex" relationship.

22. His best features and qualities? Wow. Um, my favorite quality of Ammon's is how he just listens to me when I cry. He always pays attention to everything I say. He doesn't judge me and the things I like. He doesn't make fun of me when I don't know something. He teaches me something new every day, which is amazing. He loves me for who I am, faults and all. He cooks for me. He puts my towel in the drier so it is warm when I get out of the shower. He makes me laugh like nobody else can. He makes me feel like a babe. My family is in love with him, especially my grandpa. He is patient and sweet. I would so not be in the United States if he wasn't a part of my life. Just the things I go through at Border Patrol every time I come back from Brasil...my goodness. Oh and for his features...he has the most delicious body I have ever seen. I better not write anymore cause he'll be mad at me if he reads this.

the FUCK blog

2008-08-19T22:21:00.000-07:00

hey friends!
i am thinking of changing my blog's name from Hello Kitty to just FUCK. like in CAPS. cause that says a lot about me, that i swear. i mean, really. are your eyes burning? you better stop reading my blog now. i will be posting porn videos, naked people pictures, and all sorts of nasty stuff. MAYBE i'll sometimes post some kind of gorgeous hangbag or goody that i am dreaming about, but other than that, this blog will be all about the nasty stuff.
speaking about the nasty stuff, my grandpa has cancer. and it's not getting better. you know what word i like to use when i think of cancer? the word FUCK. or how it FUCKS everything up. i lost my grandma to cancer 3 years ago and that was awful. now my grandpa has it. FUCK that. i have cried so much, like can't breathe crying, and i am so sick of it. my years of theatre have taught me how to fake all kinds of emotion, but as soon as i get home i just can't hold in the tears anymore. FUCK cancer. and FUCK being sad.
tomorrow i have to get my MMR shot tomorrow and it makes me all FUCKED up. like all tired and stuff, it sucks. and the worst part is that i had the lame shot in junior high, but my records got lost or something.

UGH I JUST SAW THE COMMERCIAL FOR RINGLING BROS CIRCUS AND THOSE GUYS ARE SUCH (LET'S KEEP THE THEME GOING! YEAH!) FUCKERS TO THEIR ANIMALS! I HATE THE CIRCUS.

i have to go to bed. i just wanted to write an offensive blog in honor of some friends of Tara. I love Tara and guess why she loves me? CAUSE SHE DON'T JUDGE! way to go t-bone, plus 500 points for you. not only are you super cute, you are also SMART for not judgying people! rock and roll. And thanks Ann and Lacy, for also not judging me. And Brett too, but Brett is just so FUCKING (yeah!) nice that you would just expect that from him. I love you guys.

OH one more thing: Brasil played Argentina and Argentina beat us 3 to 0. how FUCKED up is that? jeez.
And just in case you guys are wondering, the only swear word i don't EVER EVER say is GOSH damn it. i HATE that one and i think it's way more offensive than any other word, even the C bomb! YEAH ANN!

"pursuing other applicants"

2008-08-14T16:21:00.000-07:00

so, today i got denied for the first time when applying for a job. and this is so lame, because i knew i wouldn't get it but i tried anyway. i have no idea why i tired, but hey...i did. i got interviewed for management position at abercrombie and fitch. do i shop there? no. have i ever even worked in retail? no. but i wanted to try it. the guy that interviewed me was really nice, but kind of dumb. he was like, 30 years old and had been with abercrombie for 5 years. not exactly my idea of a stellar job, but what do i know. so he kept on asking me all these "leadership" questions and quite honestly, i am not very good at bossing people around or even telling people what to do. obviously, he saw that. he just told me that his boss decided to "pursue other applicants" but that i am great and "hey, best of luck to ya!". right. idiot. like that makes me feel any better! and who says "best of luck to ya!" anyway? douche bags do. BUT, i already had a banana republic job up my sleeve...i got offered it yesterday. it's just, i don't...it's part time and the pay blows. but at least i won't have to prepare food or get treated like crap cause someone's steak isn't cooked properly...right? and i get amazing discounts...so i'll look cute. and it's right by my house. and i'll be able to go to school part time too, which is what i should do anyway.
ammon made me feel a lot better by telling me that he has been denied for jobs he applied for too...so we have that in common as well. we are total and complete soul mates now. meant to be, and written in the stars.
let's hang out soon, i miss you girls.
xoxo
ps: come to banana republic and visit me!!! i start like....thursday, i think.

vanessa

2008-08-12T20:06:00.000-07:00

see the girl with the green eyes? yeah, that's my cousin's best friend. i'd like to look like her for a day or two.

for little L

2008-08-11T17:25:00.000-07:00

Brasil pride!

2008-08-11T17:19:00.001-07:00

So everybody knows I am in love with my country. Ammon has said that I am worse than a Texan when it comes to my pride. Well, my pride just got a little bigger...we just got Bronze medals in the men and women's division of Judo! WOO-MOTHER FUCKIN-HOO! Let me tell you, I cried. Watching two people who grew up poor, who mentioned they sometimes didn't have money for food and obviously didn't have money to take lessons, but beat all odds and won medals. How cool is that? I love my country for so many reasons, but the main one is that we are fighters! We don't give up. I know how much potential my contry has, and I have been saying for over 5 years now that I have faith in our economy and that it will get better for everyone in Brasil. You people just wait, give us a few more years and we'll show you how amazing we are!!!!

ammon's birthday

2008-08-10T20:24:00.001-07:00

so, for all of you that didn't know, my lovely husband's birthday is next month. he told me he would love to get a horse for his birthday so he can give it to me. you can take your pick from this page:

http://www.taylorarabians.com/page5.html

and also, while we are on the horse topic, i would like for you all to look at this guy (isaac):

http://www.taylorarabians.com/page24.html

he went to school with me, and always treated me like crap cause he thought he was cool. well guess what folks, he's the one that has to jack off the horses at his family's ranch so they can sell their special sauce for a brazillian dollars (love you, ann!).

WHO'S THE LOSER NOW, ISAAC???? MY THREE FRIENDS ARE MAKING FUN OF YOU AND YOUR GOOEY, SPERMY HANDS! GWAHAHAHAAAAA!

2008-08-07T11:58:00.000-07:00

a girl can dream...

2008-08-07T11:25:00.000-07:00

so here is something I don't think i've shared with you guys: I am an espresso lover. Ammon and I even have an espresso machine at home, so I can have some amazing coffee every morning. The bummer about this new Jura machine is that not only is it 3,700 dollars (yes, I wrote that correcly), it is also fully automatic. That makes me feel like a monkey in space, when all I have to do is sit there and maybe push some buttons to get a smooth and creamy drink.

I am also dreaming of this purse. I have last season's, and after buying the royal blue one from this season, I can't afford another one. I wish my love of haute couture handbags would go away...

WHY?

2008-08-06T15:38:00.000-07:00

Why are my images not being loaded? This blows. I was all proud of my dinner and now I can't show it off! Whatever. I'll post it tomorrow and you'll all be jealous.
So I just got back from working out (no Tara, I still haven't lost those 10lbs I gained forever ago, make fun of me all you want) and it was hell on earth. There is a gym here in our apartment complex and it is pretty good, except when there are sweaty people in there with you. You see, I'm a selfish bitch. I like things to myself and I hate to share. I like it when the gym is empty and I can close my eyes and bite my bottom lip and sing with Rhianna and Kanye West. I'm nerdy like that.
After Mr. Sweaty left the elliptical today, I thought my troubles were over...no. 15 minutes into my workout, Betsy (she is like, the little tour-giver person of our complex. Maybe "mystery man" can tell me what that's called in English?) walks in the gym with a fresh batch of cookies. I love cookies. We have them fresh in the office every day. I avoid going to the office at all costs because of them. So anyway, the aroma fills the air as I am trying to focus on my workout. Next song on my play list? "dat dat dat dat dat don't kill me, can only make me stronger", sings Kanye. "I OWN this elliptical!" I think to myself. 10 minutes later, here comes Betsy with two really cute girly men eating cookies. She is showing them around the complex. Great. Only 30 more minutes left, easy. 10 minutes later, Jared, one of the maintenance guys, walks in and wants to chit chat. Dear Lord. After he leaves, Lee, the other maintenance guy, decides to come in. I'm not kidding. At this point, I resorted to desparate measures: I started listening to Kylie Minogue remixes. She gets me pumped like no other. I am a big fan of Euro Pop. I was listening to it so loud that when Jared walked in for the second time, he didn't even say anything. HAHA, in your face, Jared.
Now I am going to go hike with Ammon and my sweet, sweet dogs. I'll post pictures tomorrow.
Thanks for reading my blog, girls. I feel really cool.

brasil is tha shit

2008-08-05T18:44:00.000-07:00

tagged by lacy!

2008-08-05T13:16:00.000-07:00

JUST KIDDING! No one has even read my blog yet. I basically tagged myself.

I am... a huge animal lover. there are probably only about 10 people i love more than i love animals.
I know... that I need to start running more and going to yoga everyday, but I keep putting it off because i'm dumb.
I want... for people to be more respectful to each other and to be nicer to animals.
I once... was a little rebel, but now that I am an adult i'm just a wuss.
I wish... I had time to take horseback riding lessons.
I hate... ignorance. It's not bliss!
I miss... having my mom and dad nearby.
I hear...the ASPCA is planning to shut down at least 30 puppy mills by the end of this month. YESSSS.
I crave... fancy Chris Blue chocolate all the effing time.
I search... PEREZHILTON.COM to read about dumb celebrities and to feel better about myself.
I wonder... if I'll ever be able to feel comfortable in downward dog for more than 3 minutes.
I regret... not trying harder to be friends with my dad before he got shot, even though he was a complete fucker.
I care... way too much about everything.
I always... laugh at my own jokes, even though no one else does.
I am not... ever going to give up fighting for what I believe is right.
I believe... that Brasil is the coolest place in the world.
I dance... all the time, and my dogs watch. Boomer, especially.
I sing... in the car and tap my hand on the steering wheel. I don't care how lame it looks!
I don't always... pick up my clothes. I'm getting better!
I win... the award for most emotional person ever. I cry all the time, happy crying and sad crying.
I listen... to the advice my mom and dad give me.
I can usually be found... either eating, taking naps or hiking with my pups!
I am happy about... my life with Ammon. He is da bomb.
I never.... make fun of people unless they deserve it. BOOYA!

2008-08-05T12:29:00.001-07:00

So I would like to start my first post by getting something off my chest.
When I was 8 years old, my parents made the decision to move to the good ol' US of A. I loved the idea of moving here, even though I didn't speak very much English. My mom told me it would be easy to learn and that we would go to Disneyland often, so I was sold on the idea. The thing is, before I even learned English, I already spoke Italian, understood french and was fluent in Portuguese, making English my fourth language. Practically a child genius.
I grew up with tutors and being corrected by my parents, which I don't really mind. I do mind, however, when a person who doesn't know anything about me (or bothers to find out) corrects me just so they can get a boner from it. Like cops, you just know that when they are pulling a person over they are totally pumped...literally. And that brings me to the "mystery" person I am talking about. Don't get me wrong, I like the guy. But seriously, out of the 4 times I have ever seen him in my life, he has corrected me about something at least twice in a 2-3 hour period. Ammon corrects me all the time, but he either makes me laugh about it first or he corrects me nicely, not with a "I know more than you, wah wah wah!" attitude. I know all of the three maybe four of you Reading this blog don't know me very well yet, but I promise I'm nice. I have been treated like shit by some totally awesome, much cooler than me people while growing up and I swore I would never make anyone feel the way I felt growing up.
OH I need to tell a quick story. There was this girl named Liesel in my 4th grade class that I immediately adored. Keep in mind I didn't speak any English at the time, which makes this story even cooler. So Liesel was da bomb, taught me all kinds of awesome new American words and played tag with me during recess. When we moved to the River bottoms, turned out the home girl lived right next to the place I took horseback riding lessons, total bonus. Anyway, I loved Liesel. She had really thick glasses, was about 3 feet taller than me, skinny...oh and who can forget that matted and oily hair? She was perfect. After I switched schools in 9th grade (that's when I made the choice to go to Meridian) we lost touch. Fast forward to last year when my momma was in town, we went to her super snotty friends' house. My mom tells me that "C" is Liesel's uncle. "C" is my mom's friend's husband. So I start freaking out, asking about her and everything, and "C" told me Liesel had committed suicide a few months earlier. Liesel always struggled with depression and was teased the whole fucking day while we were at school. She was and IS so amazing, and she taught me to embrace my nerdyness and the people that are worth my time will embrace their nerdyness right along with me. Moral of this story: don't be a fucker to people. You are not better than anyone else because you are cuter or have more money. Your shit does stink.
xoxo

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